Forever in the Past and Forever in the Future

Milo’s POV

Marco had told us to find her binder before Bronx ordered us to lock him in solitary confinement. He said Kas kept note cards and binders for everything. We just had to find the correct binder to figure out what she was up to. He couldn't tell us anymore because of some sort of potion he had swallowed. He was right. We rifled through dozens of binders in her office until we found one in her desk drawer that had a sticker labeled ‘Manae Notes’.

It detailed everything, complete with cute pictures of rooms and furniture she wanted to use magic to create so her sisters would be comfortable in the home she was building for them. Some of the note cards were actually thin sheets of parchment that looked like they were hundreds of years old. Others were thick handmade papers that were crumbling on the edges. There were at least six different languages among the cards. Musu helped us translate most of them, but a few she said were in dead languages she wasn’t familiar with.

Regardless, they all pointed to the fact that Kas has known for centuries that there were problems within the Manae that needed to be fixed, and she was taking it upon herself to fix it. Looking at the notecards, it all seems very hopeful and sweet. In any other format, you recognize she is a damn genius.

It just seems like she went about things in kinda fucked up ways over the course of her lifetimes. From the information James has got off Kas’s server blade, it's hard to tell if she was playing a part or she really didn’t know any better. Either way, history shows, Kas isn’t afraid to get her hands dirty.

I wish she would have felt like she could have told us, but after reading about the things she has done in the past and knowing Kas as well asI do, I bet she was embarrassed to have to admit to some of those things. She is also the type of person who thinks she can’t share her problems with others, so I can see where she felt like she was on her own little island with all this stuff.

We kept our discovery a secret for a few weeks until we walked by Bronx’s office one day and the door was wide open. We had taken the binder out of Kas’s office so our MasonCo tech team could start scanning and archiving everything. Bronx stupidly threw it into the fireplace before we could have time to do that. Then he ordered us not to talk about Kas anymore and wouldn't listen to reason. If he would have just let us tell him about her plan, about what she was really doing, maybe he would have changed his mind and not rejected her. Maybe we could have convinced him to go look for her instead.

Reggie and I assumed when the guardhouse mind linked us, they were bored and fucking around or it was some sort of magic trick by the Mavri Magea. Either way, we needed to check it out. There is no way Kas would come back, would she? We all assumed she got corrupted by dark magic and left us. As soon as I get out of the car, Ican smell her cinnamon roll scent and I know it isn't a trick.

My heart breaks for her when she cries and apologizes for what happened to Lenora. I can see how much it pains her and any doubts I had, whether she was involved or not, have been alleviated. Kas may have kept secrets from us, but it was for good reason and she doesn't have it in her to be dishonest.

What I wasn’t ready for was her physical appearance. Kas isn’t just too skinny, she also looks like shit. Her hair isn't sparkly gray anymore. It has turned completely white in just a few months. Her skin is dry and blotchy and pale. The dark circles under her eyes make it look like someone punched her, and she didn’t defend herself. Her eyes...I don’t know how to even describe it. They went from violet and full of life to practically white and devoid of anything. It seriously looks like she could be in one of those zombie movies as the main character that got bit but hasn't died yet.

Alarm bells go off in my brain when we see how pregnant she is. I know Bronx hasn't been the easiest wolf to deal with the past four months, but I’m sure if he knew Kas was pregnant when she left, he would have never rejected her. He would have fought harder to find her and his pups. How the Hell did she survive the pain of being rejected, anyway? Who knows? We just need to be grateful that she didn’t accept the rejection. He would have become impossible to be near.

“How are we getting her into the packhouse?” Reggie whispers when he looks into the back seat and sees her sleeping.

“Up the back staircase. We can take her to my apartment. Codi is at daycare, no one will have a reason to go into my place,” I say not taking my eyes off the snowy road, “I think the real question is, how the Hell are we going to get Bronx to listen to us?”

Reggie heads to the kitchen to get a snack and a protein shake ‘for himself, while I take our Luna up to my apartment. She doesn't even try to wake up when I lay her on the sofa and lay another blanket to put on top of her.

I write her a quick note to stay in the apartment before Reggie and I step into the hall. He stands outside my door with his hands on his hips.

“Milo, I'm trying to be hopeful here, but let's be honest. This is bad,” he whispers softly.

“I know, but we can’t keep it a secret from him,” I clap my hand on his shoulder.

“He's gonna throw her in the dungeon.”

“He isn’t gonna do shit, Reggie. He’s gonna make us do it. We can only hope that he’s sloppy about it and we can still take care of her.”

“Do we tell him about the pups?”

I look around for a moment, “Yeah. I think it’s the ace up our sleeve. I don’t think he'll listen otherwise.”

We knock on his office door and wait for him to tell us to come in. He is at his desk reading the newspaper, but he has yet another bottle of bourbon on his desk, soI don’t know how much he is really getting out of the article.

“Bronx, we need to talk to you,” Reggie says calmly.

“Well, that's why people usually knock on the office door, Reggie. Not because they want to stare at me in silence,” Bronx says without looking away from the paper.

Reggie rolls his eyes and waves his hand at me. Okay, here we go.

“Bronx, she’s back. And she’s-”

“Who's back?” He puts the paper down and looks at me with glassy eyes. Fuck. He’s already drunk. It’s not even two p.m.

I try to say her name, but I can’t. Then I remember he ordered us not to say her name in front of him anymore, “Our Luna.”

“Take her to the dungeon,” he says like he is ordering a steak and goes back to his newspaper.

“No. Dude, she’s-”

“Did I stutter?” He puts the paper back down and glares at me.

“Bronx, she needs a doctor and needs to be fed. She’s-” Reggie tries to step in.

“No fucking doctors. Let her use her wolf and her precious magic to heal herself. If she can't, let her rot,” he snarls with anger, pounding his fist on the desk.

“Dude, will you listen? She’s pr-” I start, but he interrupts me again.

“SHUT UP!” He roars in his Alpha tone, “ Take her to the dungeon. She doesn’t get access to a doctor or anyone else in the fucking pack. Security twenty-four, seven and feed her scraps from the trash, like the pig she is.” »

I have never felt so much rage roll off of Bronx. I can’t believe he is saying this about Kas. He can’t really feel this way. He can’t expect Reggie and me to treat her that way. She’s our Luna. We both step back, forced to bow our heads and show him our necks.

“GET THE FUCK OUT" he roars again. I look at Reggie and turn and leave. He slams the door behind him. '

“Now what?" he asks, “I can’t believe he didn’t let us get a word in. How are we going to tell her she has to go to the dungeon?”

“What choice do we have, Reggie?”

“We don't. Come on,” he waves me on to follow him.

“If he really does this. If he really allows her to die in the dungeon without even going to see her and see what the fuck he’s doing, I’m done. I'm going to figure out how to find the Manae, take Ashley and Katie, and go. Katie is going to need them as she gets older,” he whispers as we walk down the hall. °

“Did you read my mind or something? I was just thinking, maybe it is time to take Codi and find somewhere else to be. Are we really able to give up on him like that? It has to be both of us or nothing. If one of us stays, they will be miserable. There won't be any escape after that,” I say to him seriously.

“I have to do what's best for my family. If Kas dies in that dungeon, I’m out, Milo,” his light blue eyes stare at me intently.

“Yeah. I can’t imagine staying if he stoops that low,” I agree, “We have to keep trying to get him to go see her though, agreed?”

“Agreed.”

I open the door to my apartment to Kas sitting on the sofa. She looks over at me sadly.

“It didn't go well, did it?” she asks.

“Ah, no. How did you know?” I ask, rubbing my hand on the back of my neck.

“I heard him all the way from here,” she nods and looks at her lap.

“We tried, Little Sister,” I sit on the sofa next to her and take her hands in mine,

“He’s so blinded by anger, that he won't even listen. We couldn't even tell him about the pups.”

“Kas, we have to take you to the dungeon. He said no doctors and uh, only food from the trash,” Reggie says remorsefully.

“It's okay, you guys. I told you, the most important thing is that my pups are safe. Ihave accepted my fate. There is nothing left for me to do in this lifetime except give birth to these babies,” she takes her hands out of mine and puts them on her stomach.

Reggie rubs his forehead with his hand, “Kas, you deserve better.” '

“Reggie, really, it’s okay. All I ask is that I have some warm blankets. I have been so cold lately. If my old green and gray blanket is still around somewhere, I would love to have that,” she smiles, “Oh, and you can bring me as much garbage food as you want. I’m not eating it. That's disgusting.”

“Kas, you-” I try to reason with her.

“Let me just finish this sandwich and bananas, then I will willingly go with you. Okay?” she swallows hard and smiles, “While I eat, please take a couple notes. I need to give you information so you can reach the Manae when the time is right.”

“Of course, Kas. Take your time,” I nod and wipe a tear away from my eye and pull out my cell phone. I don’t know how she can be so stoic right now, but I know Reggie and I need to be strong for her.