Forever in the Past and Forever in the Future

The first thing I do once Kas unwraps herself from around me is go into the closet and put my gun back

in its lockbox before I bury the box back into the bottom of the trunk. If at all possible, I never want to

see it again.

Once I get out of my tac gear, I get in the shower. I only use hot water, letting it turn my skin red and

raw. I’m not sure how long! stand there. It doesn’t matter. I just let my brain shut down and let the water

cleanse me. Ironic to have a wolf named Saint when we feel like we are anything but.

I finally feel a little better, so I go to the closet and put on sweats. I sit on the floor and dial my therapist,

making an appointment for the next day. When I come out of the bedroom, I smell chicken cooking and

Kas Is sitting on the sofa reading a magazine. I pull my mate close to me and just breathe her in. I

instantly feel more calm. So does Saint.

“Sweetheart, what do you say we let Saint and Lex go for a run?” Kas suggests as she runs her fingers

through my hair, “They could use some time together, yeah?”

“Yes, let me spend time with my mate, please. I behaved myself the last four days. I deserve some time

with her,” Saint sighs. He has been well behaved the last four days. There were plenty of times where

he and I could have completely lost our shit, but we held it together.

“That sounds good, Baby, but I have one thing I need to do before we shift. Give me a minute then we

can head out to the woods,” I give her a quick kiss and go back into the closet pulling all my gear into a

bag. I grab the pack of cigarettes out of my pocket. There is one left. I tuck it behind my ear and put the

lighter in my pocket.

“Bronx. Is this really a good time to do this?” Saint asks. He sounds a bit nervous.

“Yeah, man. I promised Kas and besides, we both know I! can’t do this anymore,” I sigh, “Too many

people count on me.”

“Alright. You're gonna really go through with this, huh?” Saint shakes his head.

“Yeah. It’s time, buddy.”

I pick up the bag with my gear and head out to the woods with Kas.

“Come on Baby, let’s go to the back of the meadow,” I take Kas’s hand and we walk to the farthest area

from the

packhouse that is not wooded. We come to an old fire pit. I take my bag and throw it in the middle.

“What's in the bag, Bronx?” Kas asks quizzically.

“Doesn't matter, Baby. It’s forever in the past now. You're my future, not that bag,” I say emotionlessly.

I pull the lighter out of my pocket and light my last cigarette. Then I take the lighter and hold it against

the bag until it catches fire. I throw the lighter on top of the bag. I finish the cigarette and throw the butt

onto the top of the bag and take Kas’s hand. I feel her wrap her arm around me. I pull her in for a hug

but never take my eyes off the little fire. We stand there and watch until there is nothing left but embers

and metal clasps from the bag. '

“Feel better?” she asks when she feels me sigh deeply.

“A bit, yeah,” I smile, “Come on, let's let Saint and Lex out.”

We let Saint and Lex run and spend time together until well after midnight before we made our way

back to the packhouse.

When we get to the hallway on the fifth floor, we find Delilah is standing with James.

“Everything alright, Delilah?” Kas asked, taking Delilah’s hand.

“Yeah,” she turns to me sympathetically, “Alpha, not magic, but I do have a tincture that will help you

sleep tonight, if you would like? Itisa concentrated version of melatonin. Beta Milo mentioned

sometimes you have trouble sleeping after...um, working with Gamma Reggie. Kas, I have one for you

as well but it has other herbs in it. You should take it when Alpha Bronx takes his, it will help...open

your energy to your mate while he is in a relaxed state.” °

Something seems off, but I can’t put my finger on it.

“Thanks, Delilah,” I take the vial from her and head into the apartment with

Kas.

Kas’s POV

Odd that Delilah would interrupt James at work. I know Bronx had requested she spend more time with

me while he was gone which I really appreciated. James must have told her Bronx was home. °

We take the vials of clear liquid from her and step into the apartment. I open the little bottle and sniff it.

There is a sickly sweet floral scent. Bronx sniffs his. It is basically odorless.

“Bottom’s up, I guess,” I shrug. We tap the vials together and drink them down like shots of liquor.

Bronx takes me into the bathroom so we can get a shower before we go to bed and intertwine our

bodies together. Whatever was in the vials works quick because we are both asleep minutes after our

heads hit the pillows.

kkk

I wake up in a cold sweat, panting heavily. I think I had a dream but I can't remember what it was about.

I have such a strong sense of deja vu. What was in that vial Delilah gave me? My heart is racing as I

try to take some calming breaths. The light of the moon casts a serene blue light over

everything in the room. Bronx is snoring lightly beside me. I am glad whatever she gave him is letting

him get a good night's sleep. He seemed so stressed when he got home.

I can still feel my heart pounding. No way I'm getting back to sleep, so I go out to the kitchen for a cup

of water. I take a few sips of water, trying to remember the dream that made me wake up in such a

state. I just can't recall it. My heart is thumping so hard it almost hurts. I hear noises coming from the

bedroom. Did I wake Bronx up? I could have sworn he was still snoring when I left the room. He must

have felt me get out of bed.

“Bronx? I’m right here, Sweetheart,” I say softly as I make my way back to the bedroom.

Bronx is still in bed, thrashing wildly. Whimpering and cursing under his breath, fighting off an invisible

assailant in his sleep.

I rush over and turn on the bedside lamp before I crawl onto the bed. “Bronx, Sweetheart! Wake up.

You're having a nightmare,” I grasp his shoulders, his face covered in sweat. He easily pushes me off,

growling and cursing deeply at whoever he is fighting in his dream, “Bronx! Wake up, please!”

Very suddenly, he becomes deathly still. “B-Bronx? A-are you okay?” I lean forward to look at him

closer.

His eye shoots open, wider than I have ever seen before and he sits straight up in bed. Fear and anger

roll off of him as every muscle in his body tenses. His skin stretches tight over his tensed muscles, his

hands curl into fists, and lets out a roar so loud the entire room reverberates. Every instinct is telling me

to back up, but I'm frozen to the spot. Bronx needs my help. He is breathing roughly through his

nostrils, his whole body is shaking in anger, reminding me of a charging bull as his body shakes, the

anger building.

“B-Bronx?” I gently touch his arm. He snaps his head toward me, as if he is seeing me for the first time

since he woke up. There is no recognition on his face, I might as well be a complete stranger. Rage

rolls off of him. His normally beautiful green eye scares me and I start backing away, off the bed. As if

on queue, his eye turns solid black and he lunges forward at me.

“SAINT!” I scream, rolling off the bed onto the floor, trying to take a defensive stance, “Saint, it’s me. It's

Kas!”

I scramble on the floor toward the door but Bronx jumps off the bed and charges at me. His hands

tightly wrap around my throat and don’t stop until he has me pinned to the wall. My feet are dangling off

the ground as he leans forward. I can feel Saint's claws dig into my neck. His fangs start to extend.

Ican hear voices coming from the hallway, trying to break down the apartment door. Help is on the way.

I need to stall. I need to talk sense into Saint.

“WHERE IS MY MATE?” He growls through Bronx’s body.

“Sai-nt. It’s me,” I choke out the words, tring to reason with him. He looks like he is out for blood. It's

like he’s never seen me before. I choke and gag, helplessly hitting his forearms as he continues to cut

off my air supply. I have practiced this with James and Marco, but I feel so weak and dizzy.

Like all my energy has been drained. My heart is slowing. Each beat thumps harder and painfully more

desperate in my chest. I try to claw him, but Lex refuses to hurt her mate, so she won't extend her

claws. She just howls in pain in my mind.

“WHERE IS SHE?” he snarls again. He pulls me away from the wall and slams me against it again,

pushing all the air out of my lungs. I can’t answer, all Ican do is hang like a ragdoll by my neck. My eyes

are bulging out of my head and tears are streaming down my cheeks. My mate is going to kill me.

Sensing there is no other choice, I feel Lex finally concede. I make a last ditch effort and let all the

energy I have left heat up my hands and place them on top of his. I can feel his hands blistering under

the blazing heat of mine. It doesn’t seem to faze the near feral wolf.

The edges of my vision begin to blur and spots start to form. Darker and darker. The only thing I can

make out is the onyx abyss of Saint’s eye. The wolf possessing my mate's body. He is supposed to lo-