And Then There Were Four (Lilith Carrie)

Chapter 177: What feels right

Silas.

"Cassie-"

Darkness filled my vision as I searched through the obsidian clouds for her body. The darkness slowly

gave way to the roaring sound of chaos, and an explosion of power that illuminated the area. There

upon the floor was the delicate body of a woman with pink shades within her hair and celestial blue

eyes that stared blankly at me.

"Cassie... no-" What I saw before me wasn't real. Her body, lifeless upon the floor while a mirrored

image of her stood ghostly before her brother's body. She was powerful and far more beautiful than I

could ever imagine her being, but there was one problem.

She was no longer attainable...she was a goddess now, and far from my reach.

I'd lose her just like I lost Anna.

Flashes of the day Cassie died spun through my mind more than once since I had been gone.

Watching Cassie die wasn't something I hadn’t been able to handle. The moment of her death made

Anna's death flash through my mind and my heart broke.

Granted, things with Anna had been different, and perhaps part of me had loved Anna- even though I

knew I couldn't have her-but the problem was I cared for Cassie more than I ever did Anna.

Odin, seemed to have sensed this and sent me on an errand to appease the Fae realm.

Not something I was crazy about, but with my job done there, it was time for me to face the woman I

was in love with. The one woman I wouldn't be able to have no matter how much I wanted her.

The moment I stepped into her room and heard her beautiful voice, I couldn't contain myself from

making a smartass comment. I half expected her to lash out at me with anger, but instead she ran to

me, throwing her arms around my neck as she hugged me.

Never had I imagined she would give me this kind of reaction, but feeling her within my arms was

something I would never forget. “Silas, where have you been?"

"I'm sorry-" I whispered, "I was out of the realm on business."

As she pulled away slightly, I had the opportunity to gaze down in her beautiful celestial blue eyes once

more, and though my heart clenched with hurt over my situation, I pushed a brave smile on my face.

"Oh, I wasn't told that..."

“Yeah, Odin had me go take care of things. Honestly, I didn't think you would be excited about seeing

me though. Maybe I should leave more often."

The deep chuckle that escaped me made her roll her eyes as she pulled away more and shook her

head. 'No, you're not allowed to leave anymore. I need you here with me."

As much as I wanted to believe what she was saying, I knew that wasn't possible. I couldn't allow her to

need me because I wasn't going to be able to be what she wanted. That wasn’t my place. I was a

protector of the realm, and emissary if need be.

I wasn't someone who would ever be able to stand by her side.

However, perhaps tonight I could help her... or at least be a friend by her side... for the moment.

"Well, I'm here now. What's been going on?" Gesturing to the sofa she had once been sitting on, she

followed me and sat down upon it looking more frustrated then I had ever seen her.

"I don't know what I'm doing, Silas," she replied running her hands over her face before her fingers

rushed through her hair showing the clear frustration that she felt. 'I feel so out of place here."

Taking a seat upon the chair across from where she was sat I nodded. "I see. So while I was gone the

past few weeks no one has really explained anything to you?"

"No," she scoffed. "They only paraded me in front of a group of people I don't know, and then told me I

need to do training."

Concern filled me as I furrowed my brows in response to what she had said. I had been gone for

weeks, and she wasn't any more informed than what she had been when I left. "That doesn't make any

sense. I have been gone for weeks... I would have thought they would have done all that stuff quite

early on."

Cassie was quite for a moment before a soft breath escaped her lips and she cast her eyes towards

the floor. "I wasn't exactly myself after what happened. The powers Pollux gave me were a lot to

handle, and I slept for what felt like days before I woke up."

All of which I hadn't been there for... I was a fool to have left like I did, but what Odin had me do was far

more important than simply sitting by Cassie's bed when I wasn't actually welcome.

'I wish I could have been here for you when you woke up, but I'm here now and I'd be happy to answer

any questions you have. The solstice games are something to look forward to."

Laughter escaped Cassie as she gave me a look of sarcastic uncertainty. “I don't know about that,

Silas. The seem to be nothing but a pain in the ass and I haven't even done anything yet. Although..."

she said pointedly, "I did get Odin to agree to let me help plan them."

'Oh shit. Really?" To hear Odin was willing to let Cassie help was shocking. He never let anyone help

with the games as it was something he enjoyed setting up himself.

"Yeah." She shrugged. 'I have no clue how they go though so it’s not like I'm going to be as much help

as I thought I could be."

The more she talked, the more I couldn't help but watch her. The way she pushed her hair behind her

ear. How her lips moved as she told the story of how it was meeting everyone that would take part in

the games. She was mesmerizing, and the more her voice floated around me, the more I realized that

being even this close to her could be problematic.

Weighing my choices, I sighed, caving in to the pitiful look on Cassies face. I had seen it before in Anna

when she came here, and though Anna was a different situation I couldn't allow Cassie to have no one

in her corner.

She had far more to offer this realm and others with her realistic view on the world.

'I'll help you, Cassie."

Her eyes darted up to mine with a mixture hope and gratefulness I couldn't ignore, and with a smile

crossing her plump, delicious lips, I had to reign in my beast that wanted to claim her. Cassie was

extraordinary, but the godly glow that illuminated her and heightened every bit of her beautiful body

made her that much more attractive.

"Are you sure? I don't want to impose on anything you currently have going on," she replied hesitantly.

'I'm sure," I retorted, adjusting myself in my seat as I cleared my throat. "Typically the games are a

mixture of strength, agility, and intelligence. So lets start with the basics. Strength."

Her eyes lit up at my words, and as she bit her bottom lip thinking about what I said I tried my hardest

to look anywhere but at her. "What about sparring matches or something?"

'That's what they usually do." I chuckled before standing to my feet. The itch to move around growing

inside me as I began to wander about her room looking at everything, but realizing that as pretty as this

room was, it didn't reflect Cassie's personality.

“Well, what can we do to make it different?"

The question was honestly only something she could answer, and as I turned to face her, I simply gave

her a small smile. "You’re the designer, Cassie. Make it fit your personality."

“My personality?" She scoffed rolling her eyes. "That wouldn’t be good for anyone. No one seems to

like my personality much."

Turning to face her, I shook my head. "That's not true. I like your personality."

The blush that settled over her face was something I wouldn't ever get tired of doing. She tried so hard

to hide her emotions at times but the moment I complimented her, she blushed so red her ears turned

pink. 'You're just saying that because you're my friend."

Ouch. Friend... I forgot how much that word stung.

"Regardless of my friendship with you, it's still true," I replied, acting as if the comment she made didn't

hurt,'so with that being said... what about strength do you think would be beneficial in a tournament?"

A snort of laughter escaped her as she shrugged. "Taking me on would be a good one... but I really

don't know how to control this new version of me."

"Taking you on?" Raising a brow at her comment, I faced her, watching her mouth open and close

slowly before a smirk crossed her lips.

“Well, yeah, I mean... before this all happened, there wasn't a single person here who could match me,

but now, I guess that's different as I'm not the same person."

Every part of me wanted to clear the space between us and put her in her place but I restrained myself

from doing so. "You're so confident in who you were... there isn't a reason why you shouldn't still be

confident in who you will become."

Standing to her feet, she stared at me with silence as she slowly made her way towards me. “You think

I'm confident... you say I'm pretty... if that's the case, why are you acting as if being around me right

now is almost impossible for you to do even though you say you want to help?"

I was caught between a rock and a hard place with her comment because the look she was giving me

right now made it clear that she knew something was up. "I don't know what you mean-'

'Don't do that..." she snapped as she shook her head clearing the space between us. Her hand laid

upon my chest as she looked up at me with those big celestial eyes and pouty lips.

Letting out a raspy breath, I froze at her touch. 'Do what?"

'Pretend the tension between us isn't there. I know you're uncomfortable right now, and after everything

we have been through, I don't understand why you’re acting like this. I thought I meant more to you.'

“You do," I quickly added trying to catch my breath. Her delicious scent of lavender and honey wrapped

around my heart in a way I couldn't handle. "I just have to be realistic about all of this for the both of

us."

Furrowing her brows she stared at me with confusion. "Realistic... what are you talking about?"

I didn't want to explain this to her, and the more I stood with her like this, the more I knew I had to say

something. Yet, I didn't want to be the fool who assumed things when I wasn't completely sure of what

this was in the first place.

Taking a deep breath, I sighed closing my eyes. “As much as I want to be with you right now, I can’t. I

am a guardian of the realm, Cassie, and all I can ever be is your friend. The way I acted before was

wrong."

“Wrong?" she replied, reaching up slowly to run her hand down the side of my face, “nothing about any

of this has ever been wrong... but every part of it feels right."

Without warning, she leaned up on her tippy toes and pressed her lips to mine, and when she did, I lost

all control of who I was. The situation may have been wrong on one hand, but Cassie was right about

something... every part of this felt right.