Cultivation Chat Group (Web Novel)

Chapter 132: My Surname Is Song. This Is My ID Card!

Translator: GodBrandy Editor: Kurisu

Song Shuhang looked at that hardcover notebook somewhat incredulously. Was it an ace up their sleeve? Could it help them? Meanwhile, that innocent-looking disciple started speaking. “Ah, I found it. Here it is: ‘As a professional monster beast keeper, I’d like to introduce you to some of my own experiences, and some of the experiences that have been handed down from senior keepers. Now, let’s suppose that you run into a big feline or canine carnivorous monster beast, now what should you do?’” The boy reading the manual was excited.

Senior Brother Zheng Hong, you are so great! This is exactly what we need!

He kept reading.

“’At this time, you must not panic. Keep calm. First of all, look at the eyes of the monster beast—is it staring at you without moving its eyes away? If it is, you have to pay attention. I can tell you very definitively that this proves that you have been listed in its menu!’”

The disciple of Immortal Farming Sect immediately looked up at the monster Pekingese. Just as recorded in the notebook, the big monster beast was staring at the crowd and approaching them step by step.

Obviously, it had listed all of them in its menu.

“Come on, keep reading, has Senior Brother Zheng Hong recorded any method to deal with big canine monster beast?” someone cried out.

The disciple with an innocent face continued to read. “’At this time, you should not panic. Keep calm. Remember not to lower your head or bend your body to expose your vital parts. Otherwise, the monster beast will take you as its prey. Remember not to turn back to run for your life, because you can never run faster than a monster beast. This action will only arouse the monster beast’s hunting instinct instead. Especially so for the feline monster beasts, they are very fond of playing with escaping prey. Even if they’re not hungry, they like to play with their prey until it dies.

At this time, you should stand up straight, and stare at it seriously and angrily. Then, you should open your arms and shout loudly at the monster beast: ‘Fu*k you! Come to eat me, motherfuck*er!’ or ‘If you dare not to eat me, you are a bastard!’ something like that. Just be courageous!’”

When that disciple read here, a disciple of Immortal Farming Sect quickly stood out.

He came up to the monster Pekingese, opened his arms, looked at it seriously, and then shouted in an angry voice, “F*ck you! Come to eat me, motherfu*ker! If you dare not eat me, you are a bastard!”

Roaring boldly, he seemed unstoppable!

“…” Song Shuhang really doubted it. Would it work? Wouldn’t he annoy the monster Pekingese by doing this instead?

He remembered that the seniors of Nine Provinces Number One Group had mentioned in chat that high-rank monster beasts had the wisdom not inferior to human beings’ and could speak human languages.

However… to his surprise, this seemingly dumb method really worked!

The monster Pekingese in the sky really paused. It squatted in the air and looked at the disciple, putting out its tongue.

“It works, it really works. Come on. Keep reading. What should we do next? How can we drive this canine monster beast away?” seeing this, the disciple trying to make himself look serious and angry asked, full of confidence.

The disciple with an innocent face nodded and continued to read the next page, full of anticipation.

However, there was only one sentence on the last page.

’In this way, you can die with dignity…’

“…”

Are you kidding me?

That disciple immediately closed the notebook.

Senior Brother Zheng Hong, fu*k you! How could you do this to me? I am your junior brother!

“Read the next step! I have already shocked this monster Pekingese! Now, tell me what am I going to do next? Otherwise, it won’t stop long! ” exclaimed the disciple who came out boldly.

What should I do? What should I do?

With moist eyes, the innocent-looking disciple felt like crying.

❄️❄️❄️

Crouching in the air, the monster Pekingese looked at the disciples of Immortal Farming Sect shouting and screaming, its eyes full of wicked amusement. Yes, Song Shuhang was quite sure of that—that emotion was really vivid in its eyes.

When he saw the look in its eyes, he secretly heaved a breath of relief. At the very least, the monster Pekingese meant no harm to him and the disciples.

After ‘laughing’, it stood up and shook its hair. Then, it stepped on the air and left. Before leaving, it gave a meaningful look at Song Shuhang.

After the monster Pekingese left, the disciples of Immortal Farming Sect were all relieved, and the disciple who just stood up to yell at the ‘monster Pekingese’ fell down to the ground and couldn’t stand up any longer.

“The way that Senior Brother Zheng Hong recorded really worked. The monster Pekingese really left!” The disciple did not know he had almost died and kept praising Senior Brother Zheng Hong’s sh*itty method. “Next time I meet any feline or canine monster beast, I won’t be afraid anymore!”

The innocent-looking disciple held the notebook tightly, wondering whether he should show the last sentence in the notebook to this senior brother or not. What if that senior brother didn’t run for his life but came out to scold the next monster beast he met? He might end up being eaten!

After resting in situ for quite a while, the disciples of Immortal Farming Sect finally recovered.

They sat together in a circle, waiting for their leader, ‘Senior Brother Zheng Neng’, to come.

Song Shuhang sat alone on the other side, leaning against a tree.

Now… he should find a way to return to Jiangnan College first. He was thrown into the wilderness, and he had to look around to see if there was any road.

Besides, he’d better call Su Clan’s Sixteen and tell her he was safe.

And… he should also tell her what had happened to Immortal Farming Sect.

Song Shuhang looked at the disciples of Immortal Farming Sect who stayed together. I owe them two now.

If they didn’t attack Demon Monarch Anzhi, Song Shuhang wouldn’t even have a chance to get away.

After that, that Senior Brother Zheng Yan fed him a healing pill.

Thinking of this, he rubbed his temples.

There was still an unsolved feud between Immortal Farming Sect and ‘Su Clan’s Seven’. Though there was a lot of questionable points, disciples of Immortal Farming Sect seemed to believe that the criminal was Seven.

As he was thinking about it, the innocent-looking disciple of Immortal Farming Sect came up to Song Shuhang and tried to put on a fierce look. “Are you the junior of Su Clan?”

His question immediately aroused the attention of many of his companions, and they were also wondering about the identity of Song Shuhang.

“I’m not… You should’ve heard how that uncle called me, right? I am just an innocent victim who got caught by Demon Monarch Anzhi by mistake,” Song Shuhang answered seriously.

“Do you have any evidence?” The innocent-looking disciple asked.

“Evidence?” Song Shuhang did not expect that he would have to prove to others that he was himself one day.

Thinking for a while, he pulled out his wallet. “If you insist… is this OK?”

He took his ID card out of his wallet.

Name: Song Shuhang. Gender: Male.

And then it was his date of birth.

A cultivator of Third Stage Realm of Immortal Farming Sect—‘Senior Brother Zheng Yan’—came over lightly, took over Song Shuhang’s ID Card and checked it.

“Yes, his surname is Song. He is not the junior of Su Clan,” Senior Brother Zheng Yan said seriously and then gave the ID back to Song Shuhang.

Both relieved and disappointed, the disciples all lowered their heads.

“Perhaps its his mother’s surname?” It seemed that the innocent-looking disciple didn’t want to leave Song Shuhang alone. He continued, “Maybe his father’s surname is Su!”

Song Shuhang said helplessly, “Hey, please don’t change the surname of my ancestors, alright?”

“I’m sorry. Our mission failed, so my junior brothers are a little bit edgy.” Senior Brother Zheng Yan rebuked that disciple and told him to go back to his companions.

Then, he sat next to Song Shuhang.

“Six days ago, Su Clan’s Seven and a strange cultivator came to visit us,” he started recounting…