Cultivation Chat Group (Web Novel)

Chapter 90: Shuhang, Go Get a Driving License!

Translator: GodBrandy Editor: Kurisu

It was almost noon when everything was over.

After saying goodbye to the little girl and her family, and declining their invitation to visit their home, Song Shuhang got on the subway back to Jiangnan College.

Neither of them asked for the other party’s contact information. After all, they just met by chance. However, they might meet again as fate would have it.

In fact, the white-shirted man wanted to ask for Song Shuhang’s contact information, but he was too embarrassed to do that…

There were not many passengers on his way back, and Song Shuhang was lucky to find an empty seat. He put a big shopping bag on his side—it contained the black suitcase of Altar Master.

After he got out from the subway, he immediately found a shopping bag to wrap the black suitcase. After all, the black suitcase was ill-gotten. He’d better hide it.

The train slowly started, and Song Shuhang finally relaxed a little bit.

He leaned back in the seat, thinking back to the scene of killing Altar Master over and over again to try to calm down.

With a deep breath of relief, Shuhang opened his cell phone and logged in on Nine Provinces Number One Group.

There was no new messages in the group.

The last ones were sent last night when he discussed about ‘Three Claw Marks Beast Head Medallion’ with Senior Northern River and Soft Feather.

Thinking for a while, Song Shuhang sent a message in the group. ” @Palace Master Seven Lives Talisman , Senior, I have found the guy behind the Three Claw Marks Beast Head Medallion—Altar Master—and killed him. And I used two ‘evil-warding talismans’ and three ‘sword talismans’ in the fight. But I’m not going to go after the other members of Three Claw Marks Beast Head Medallion for now.

Also, I’ll send back the remaining talismans to you.”

As soon as he sent the message, there was a response from Nine Provinces Number One Group.

Palace Master Seven Lives Talisman: “Little Friend Shuhang, you are as fast as a running rabbit! Great efficiency! Well done!

And you don’t need to send back the remaining talismans to me. Just keep them as a small gift. Besides… I can’t receive them even if you send them back to me.

Now, I am on an island in the Pacific, teaching a group of primitive people to read. Damn, how could I have vowed to ‘teach ten thousand people to read as everybody deserves the right to education’? How bored was I to make such a vow! Nowadays, with the popularization of compulsory education, it’s hard to find someone who can’t read. I spent so much time and energy to find a lonely island where nearly 10,000 primitive people were illiterate.

As long as I teach them how to read, I can fulfill my previous vow. But it will take several months at the soonest, or even several years if it’s slow. Why did I make such a bullsh*t vow? If, in the future, I have a chance to become a great master and acquire the ability to travel in time, I must go back to the past and give my former self a dozen loud slaps in the face and tell him to ‘shut that fuc*ing mouth up’!”

Shuhang just asked one question, and Palace Master Seven Lives Talisman had sent… a load of words. From his words, one could easily tell how much he hated the stupidity of his former self.

It looked like everyone had some terrible past.

Song Shuhang sighed.

Besides… Senior Palace Master Seven Lives Talisman was really busy. Yesterday, he was still busy around in Huaxi Area, and now, he was on a small island in the Pacific Ocean.

“Thank you, Senior! Your talismans really work, simple but powerful!” he tried to flatter the senior, hoping his flattery would make him feel better.

“Hahaha, of course. In the group, I’m the best when it comes to making talismans. No more chit-chat, I have to go back to teach the primitive people. These guys are stupid. The words that have been taught them may soon be forgotten, and I really want to give them a good beating… Well, that’s a good idea. Next time, if they dare to forget any word, I’ll hang them up and give them a good beating. Then, I bet nobody will dare to forget a single word again!” it seemed that Senior Palace Master Seven Lives Talisman was easy to distract from the topic under discussion.

Palace Master Seven Lives Talisman was apparently very satisfied with the idea, for he quickly went offline.

“…” Song Shuhang touched his heart and somehow felt uneasy. A scene popped up in his mind—a group of primitive people dressed in animal skin clothing was sitting on stones in rows and pathetically reading a poem for first-graders: ‘At noon they hoe up weeds. Their sweat drips on the soil. Who knows the rice that feeds is the fruit of hard toil!’

Suddenly, one of the primitive people forgot a word, and the next minute, he was hung on a tree and whipped hard by Palace Master Seven Lives Talisman.

“It’s not my fault. I did not suggest him do that.” Song murmured.

“Beep, beep, beep~”

There was a message from Nine Provinces Number One Group.

It was Northern River’s Loose Cultivator again. He slowly and leisurely sent a message, “Little Friend Shuhang, you always bring me a surprise. I heard that the enemy’s leader you killed was a cultivator of Second Stage Realm?”

“In fact, it’s not that dramatic. Though he was a cultivator of Second Stage Realm, he was poisoned by Senior Medicine Master first, and then mistook my real identity, for Soft Feather kept calling me ‘Senior’. So, I’ve got a chance to slay him with the help of the talismans made by Senior Palace Master Seven Lives Talisman.” Song Shuhang reiterated the whole story briefly.

“You are courageous and wise. I don’t think you won by a fluke. Keep it up. I believe you can go far on the way of cultivation,” said Northern River’s Loose Cultivator.

Thrice Reckless Mad Saber went online. “Well done, Little Shuhang. You already have some of my demeanor from when I was young!”

“Brother Thrice Reckless, didn’t you say you were gonna enter seclusion for realm breakthrough?” Northern River’s Loose Cultivator sent a ?.

“Well, I am in seclusion,” Thrice Reckless Mad Saber said. “But, even if I am in seclusion, I still need to rest. I shall not cultivate mechanically. I shall not keep cultivating behind closed doors!”

“Bullsh*it,” laughed Northern River’s Loose Cultivator.

At this time, Scholar Drunken Moon suddenly sent a message, “Thrice Reckless, you speak quite decently today. Since there is no senior master here, how could you forget about your dirty jokes? It’s not like you to act so decently.”

“Don’t mention it. Recently, the Internet is full of some mythical creatures, ¹and dirty jokes are banned. Besides, True Monarch Yellow Mountain told me he would kick me out of the group if I dared to tell dirty jokes here anymore. I’m trying very hard to hold it in. Let’s have a party next time, and then I’ll show you some classic ones,” chuckled Thrice Reckless Mad Saber.

“Hoho”. Scholar Drunken Moon sent a ? and quietly returned to lurking.

Song Shuhang scratched his head—well, Scholar Drunken Moon’s ID felt very familiar to him, but how come he just couldn’t remember who it was?

At that moment, Northern River’s Loose Cultivator suddenly asked, “By the way, Little Friend Shuhang, are you gonna learn how to drive?”

“Well, yes. I have been reading books on driving theories, and I plan to apply for a driver’s license in the near future. Oh? How do you know I was gonna learn how to drive? “Song Shuhang asked.

“Haha, when I was stealing vegetables on your game farm, I visited your Qzone. You had mentioned you were gonna apply for a driver’s license recently in your Qzone,” Northern River’s Loose Cultivator gloated. “Besides, level up your farmland when you have the time. It doesn’t make any sense for you to collect so many coins. The vegetables will grow faster if you get the land leveled up, and then I can steal more.”

Stealing vegetables?!

My God, Senior, how much spare time do you have every day? How could you even play that childish game—Happy Farm?

And, are you really so bored that you even had the time to check my Qzone?

Image, pay attention to your image! Since I met you seniors, the image of cultivators has totally collapsed in my heart. If possible, would you please pay some attention to your image for the sake of my fragile heart?

Anyway… why did the senior ask me about the license?

“Senior Northern River,” Song Shuhang asked carefully, “Do you want to learn how to drive?”

“Why should I learn how to drive? It’s much quicker to ride a flying sword than to drive a car. And I don’t need to worry about roadblocks… I just need to be careful not to bump into a plane,” Northern River’s Loose Cultivator laughed. “But… I can tell you something. If you have time these days, go and get your license as soon as possible. I promise you’ll have a lot of benefits.”

Song Shuang’s eyes grew wide— Is there a senior in the group who suddenly wants to learn how to drive? And I can teach him how to drive after getting the license?

And, the benefits were obvious—the rule of Nine Provinces Number One Group is: Work → Get rewarded!

“Have you guessed it? You can even ask for qi and blood pills then. Not only pills, you can even get a cultivation technique! The techniques Medicine Master gave you are just basic ones for Foundation Establishment. With them, you can only reach the peak of First Stage Realm at best. So, I formally inform you about this chance. I bet you can get a very good technique then.” Northern River’s Loose Cultivator sent a ?. “A good chance, isn’t it!”

Yes, it’s a good chance! Shuhang thought!