Ex-Husband’s Regret by Evelyn M.M

“You can't be serious,” | whispered, trying to wrap my head around what he had just said.

Like I said, | know Gabe and | know this isn’t an idle threat. Given that, | still needed to make sure, because after all, this is Lilly we were talking about. She's not only my daughter, but also my life. | couldn't let him take her from me. It would surely kill me.

“Do | look like I'm joking?” he asks as his eyes sear into me. “I can assure you that I'm fucking serious, Harper.” Have you ever felt like you've been hit, even though nothing has happened? That is how | feel right now. A phantom hit, right in my gut. | force myself to breathe through the pain. | couldn't afford to lose it right now, even though | wanted nothing more than to break down, cry and curse Gabriel all the way to hell.

“Why are you doing this?” | asked, close to tears. “You divorcedand kickedout, Gabriel. | left, just like you wanted, and I've never bothered you again. Why can’t you do the same? Why do you want to turn my life upside down?” | just couldn’t understand it. | couldn’t understand why the hell he was doing this. Gabriel is a playboy. Plain and simple. | don’t see him settled as a family guy. He wasn’t a good husband, and | can bet everything | own that he won't be a good father.

“Don't givethat crap, Harper... You want to start questioning my motives. Let's start by asking why you hid my child from me.

| think that is a better question.” He had been calm, but now he looked pissed. Actually, pissed is an understatement. He looked downright furious. He seemed ready to kill, and it'she wanted to end.

“You kept my daughter fromfor years; never once did you reach out to letknow | had fathered a child. Then, as if that wasn’t enough, you had the audacity to let another man fill in the capacity | should have been allowed to fill in as her father.

Did you laugh behind my back every tshe called him dad? Did you and your husband have a field day keeping bothand Lilly in the dark? If | hadn't found out, would you have taken that secret to the grave, Harper? This shit you pulled is low even for you, or was it your way of payingback because | didn’t love you? Take revenge onby hiding the fact that we have a daughter. Your attempt at keeping my daughter fromis pathetic, and | hate you even more for that.” His words hit like shards of glass. | can’t escape them or how they tear intoand slice open my somewhat healed heart. It's funny, really, how we delude ourselves into thinking that we've moved on. Only for something to trigger us and bring us back to the pain that we thought we'd already moved past.

It's been years since I've heard him say that he hates me. | thought that | was okay. That I'd healed. That I'd moved on with my life. Hearing him say those words takesback to when we were married. Hearing those words from him evokes pain as fresh as it was years ago.

“I didn’t keep her from you out of malice,” | whispered, trying my hardest to hide the pain his words evoked.

That's the other thing that hurts. | shouldn't care about what he thinks, but it hurts to know that he thinks | would deliberately hide Lilly just to hurt him and seek revenge. It just proves that he didn’t knowat all. If he had taken tto get to know me, he would know that | would never do anything like that.

“And you expectto believe that? You're a devious woman who used her brother to forceto marry her; | wouldn't put anything past you,” He growls, his words aimed to hurt and annihilate me.

“Then why would you want to marryagain, if 'm such a despicable person?” | snapped, angry and hurt, but I'd be damned if | let him see it.

“Like I said, it's none of your fucking business.” “Yet, it somehow involves me,” | said bitterly.

Anger radiates from him in waves. He can join the fucking club. Not only was | pissed, but | was also hurt. | hate that Gabriel still has the power to hurt me, and he is wielding it like a powerful weapon.

“You'll marryor else I'll take Lilly with me. | think it's tshe knew her biological dad.” He glares atwith so much animosity, it's a wonder I'm still alive and breathing. “Even if you refuse, | think | can get them to accept Lilly as a consolation prize.” | don't think | was meant to hear the last part, but | did anyway. Those words turn my stomach, because they just confirm what | know about Gabriel. He uses people, and he will use Lilly if he can’t getto agree to his stupid marriage proposal.

“I won't let you take my daughter, Gabriel.” My fear and pain fall away and my motherly instincts take over. | won't let him use, hurt and discard Lilly like he did with me.

“Why the hell not? She’s my daughter!” he bellows, the sound loud and thundering.

” Have you seen yourself, huh?” | “

began. “You're cold and dead inside, Gabriel. Why would | let my daughter be raised by a heartless and unfeeling man, even if that man is her biological dad? This is one of the reasons | didn't tell you | was pregnant. | didn't want my child to : ” turn out like you.”

| wanted Lilly to be kind and compassionate. | wanted her to have a heart, to be caring, humble and loving. | knew she’d turn out the opposite if Gabriel was in her life.

You're selfish, proud and arrogant.

You don't care if you hurt people or use them to get what you want . You have no loing bone in your body, so why would | let Lilly go with you? Why would | allow my precious daughter to be raised in a cold hby her cold, selfish, and playboy sperm donor?”

| see something pass in his eyes, but it's gone before | can read what it is.

Anyway, it doesn't matter ,I am sticking to my guns . When someone shows you who they are, believe them. Gabriel has already shown me who he is, and | know he hasn't changed at all.

“Given you don’t wantraising her, then you'll have no problem agreeing to the proposal.” The words are ground through clenched teeth.

| glared, wishing | had never met the unfeeling beast standing before me.

1 will do anything for Lilly. If | go against Gabriel, I'll lose her. He has his name, money, and power backing him up. | have nothing.

Sighing, | nodded. | can’t lose Lilly. | have no other choice but to agree.