I'm A Spider, So What? (WN)

Oni 14 – Decision

I pick up the book. I ponder for a while, then put it back on the desk. Then I close my eyes and think, and before I know it I’ve picked up the book again. I’ve been doing this repetitively for a long time.

I gaze at the book I picked up. To be precise it’s not a book, more like a notebook. However, to me the contents have become weightier than any book. As I flick through the pages, I give up on thinking just how many dozens of times I’ve already reread it. I’ve already memorised the contents. Though I’ve not quite memorised it verbatim, the content doesn’t change even if I reread it. Even if I want it to change, it doesn’t.

What’s written in here, is about the risk of the world collapsing, and the method to avoid it.

I bury my head in my hands. I had known about how this world came to be and about the System due to Taboo, but I’d never have thought the situation had reached the final stages. If this is really true, then I sure have been reborn into an awful world. That’s only if it’s true though.

Certainly, I can’t believe that what is written here is the truth. No, rather than saying that what’s written is mostly only the truth, maybe it would be better to say that these are facts with some unwritten lies.

The reason I think that, is because it’s too good to be true. The method written here to deal with the problem, is that if we can break up the System then the world can be saved. However, is that really the case? Until now, since such a thing has never been done before, will it really work out that well? Is it really so simple that the world can be truly saved as easily as snapping your fingers? If that’s true, then why has the world had to go through such hardships until now? Maybe I’m just being unfairly suspicious, but I simply can’t believe in this.

In addition, if the System is gone, then that means skills and status will also be gone. That which has been depended upon for survival until now, will be lost. The chaos from that should be particularly significant. What used to be easily possible with certain status values, would no longer be possible. The prosperity brought about by skills, will collapse. Effectively a depiction of pandemonium in Hell, I would expect. It might be similar to taking away electricity from modern Japan. No, considering the actual impacts involved, it may be even worse.

This book doesn’t touch on those aspects at all. Based on that, maybe inconvenient facts are being concealed, and only deceptively good facts are being covered. That’s what I’ve come to think.

To be blunt, I don’t actually understand the inner workings of the System. In that sense, Shiro-san has definitely made more progress than I have. For that reason, even if something has been concealed, I don’t have the slightest idea even why it might have been concealed. Or even whether anything has actually been hidden in the first place.

There’s no end to my doubts. However, I cannot simply discard the contents of this book as being bullshit either. In these incredibly precise contents, there is a persuasive argument. Even when I compare this to the contents from Taboo, there’s nothing out of place. For that reason, the conclusion I reached after all my agonising, is that this mostly true with some secrets and lies mixed in.

I tap my finger on the book placed on the desk. If this is mostly true, then why did Shiro-san hand me this book? Well, that part is obvious enough though. In short, I’m sure she’s telling me to choose my own destiny. Considering the contents of this book, the world is going to enter a period of upheaval. Shiro-san, is promoting that. She’s telling me that I now have to start thinking about what I should do when the time comes, I’m sure.

Shiro-san, might be unexpectedly softhearted. Though we weren’t at all particularly close in our previous lives, she’s going so far to aid me after all. With Heresy Resistance, with this book. It’s impossible that she doesn’t realise that when I’ve read this book, that there is a real possibility that we may become enemies.

I better not come up with any half-assed conclusions eh.

At this rate the world will be destroyed. There’s probably not doubt about that. However, when is that going to happen? There’s nothing written about that. All that’s written, is that at this rate the world will be destroyed. Based on the manner of writing where no definite timeframe is given, even an exaggerated example of the world being destroyed after a thousand years wouldn’t contradict the book.

Demolish the System, then use that energy to stop the destruction of the world. I think that part is the truth. If there’s a lie written here it would be in the description details, which covers even the methods and state of progress. To be honest, considering all the technical terms I can’t really make much sense of it all, but if it was made up then Shiro-san has an incredible imagination. If this all came from her imagination, then some scent of madness should be drifting around. It seems better to simply accept that what’s written here is the truth.

However, there still won’t be enough energy. It needs to be supplemented. I guess this part is where the problem lies. Supplement, in other words, to kill people and collect the energy. That’s precisely the reason why she is trying to launch a large scale war between the demons and the humans.

It’s a path that is unavoidable in order to save the world. However, is that really the case? Going back to the timeline for the collapse of the world just now, it appears likely that it’s not necessarily the situation. If it’s the case that Shiro-san is concealing the timeline for the collapse of the world and there’s still some leeway, then wouldn’t it mean that this atrocity isn’t necessary? In that case, why does it seem that Shiro-san is going to such great lengths to hurry up the action? Is there a reason why it has to be this way?

It’s probably here. There should be somewhere here that Shiro-san wants to keep hidden no matter what. I need to know what that something is. And also, whether there’s anything else that might be hidden.

I stand up with the book in my hand. When I look outside the window, I see that it’s gotten really late in the day. It’s something I’ve only realised recently, but when it’s time to eat or when it’s time to sleep Shiro-san never goes outside. She’s often not around during the day, but she always returns to the mansion around that time. Around bedtime. Right now, Shiro-san should be in her room.

I use the Appraisal Stone to confirm my status. Almost a complete recovery, but in other words, not yet a complete recovery. I only have two magic swords as well. And even those are hastily made ones from when my status had not yet recovered. I feel uneasy. Not only do I not feel in perfect health, Shiro-san’s power is unknown. If my impression isn’t mistaken, then even if I was in perfect condition it seems that I would have no chance of winning. However, if what Shiro-san is aiming for is not something that I’m able to accept, then it might turn into combat right there. I pray that will not happen.

Having made my decision, I walk towards Shiro-san’s room.