Keyboard Immortal

Chapter 594: Falling Into Your Own Trap

Translator: Pika

Zu An quickly dodged backwards. He saw some dirty yellow liquid pour down from above the door, and there was a cask below. He could smell the contents from far away.

He finally realized that someone placed a bucket of piss above the door ahead of time. Once someone pushed open the door and went inside, they would be covered in pee. Even though it wasn’t anything life threatening, it would be incredibly humiliating.

Shi Kun’s appearance appeared in his mind when he recalled Sang Hong’s reminder. He sneered. You got away pretty quickly from Brightmoon City last time, but watch how I deal with you this time.

As such, he summoned Blue Mallard and sent back the dirty yellow liquid with even greater speed.

There were two people giggling behind the door. The fatty was obviously the crown prince, while the man next to him was much more handsome, a pretty boy no matter how you looked at him. It was just a pity that his sinister gaze ruined the feeling he gave off. But no matter how much it ruined his appearance, he was still much nicer to look at than the big fatty next to him.

This man was naturally Shi Kun. He almost exploded from anger when he found out that Zu An became the crown prince’s secretary. What right does Zu An have to deserve this? He is nothing more than a scoundrel off the streets! Not only did he get the goddess he had chased after for so long, now he became the crown prince’s secretary, equals with him?

This guy is a freaking lucky bastard! That was why he decided to arrange a bucket of piss to ruin his blasted luck.

The crown prince was stupid to begin with, and he loved this type of stuff the most. He was naturally easily convinced.

But he didn’t expect the other party to react so quickly. After all, he even arranged a wind element formation by the entrance. The pile of piss was something not even a sixth rank cultivator could avoid.

When he saw the yellow liquid that was flying back, the crown prince’s mouth opened wide. He couldn’t avoid it at all on his own.

Shi Kun had the chance to block this stuff in his place, but that meant that he had to cover himself in this disgusting stuff. He even made sure to get the piss of the smelliest and dirtiest eunuch! His eyelids jumped, he really didn’t want to be covered in this stuff.

As such, he decisively shifted to the side. The crown prince was not so lucky. Even though there was a eunuch who wanted to block in front of him, he was still covered from head to toe in this filth.

After the crown prince’s initial shock, he broke out crying. “Wah… retch… Whose pee is this? Why does it smell so bad? I am definitely going to… retch…”

Shi Kun’s eyelids jumped. He was really glad that he didn’t take this stuff for the crown prince. Otherwise, he might be scarred for life.

Zu An was also stunned. He knew that things were going to be a problem from how the fatty was crying.

This damn fatty really is stupid! Even if you are going to prank someone, you don’t have to stand right behind the door, right?

Shi Kun stepped out and said, “Brazen! You dare try to assassinate the crown prince? This is a great offense punishable by the eradication of your entire clan!”

The eunuchs all voiced out their criticism as well. After all, quite a few of them had piss on them too. Whose pee is this? Why the hell does it smell so bad?

The crown prince was about to say something, but his mouth was wide open earlier, so there was quite a bit that got in. He immediately threw up as soon as he opened his mouth. “Retch…”

Zu An’s eyelids jumped. He could only look at Shi Kun and say, “It’s you again. You’re like a freaking haunted ghost.”

Shi Kun harrumphed. “You can give up on any thoughts of sucking up. You attacked the crown prince! No one can save you now.”

This was another reason why he didn’t block in front of the crown prince. He was just trying to vent some anger by pranking Zu An, but if the crown prince was the one who was pranked instead, then that would be an absolute disaster. This brat Zu An was dead for sure.

A group of guards rushed over when they heard the news. They were stunned when they saw the situation in the room. What the heck is going on? Why is the crown prince’s study so filthy?

But they noticed the crown prince’s situation. Furthermore, with how Shi Kun was pointing at Zu An, all of them pointed their blades at Zu An to arrest him.

“Wait!” Zu An pointed at Shi Kun. “You said that I tried to kill the crown prince. Then what did I use to do so?”

“Of course it’s…” Shi Kun was just about to point at the piss bucket, but he suddenly couldn’t continue. What assassin would use a bucket of piss to kill? Who would believe him? It’s all his fault for trying to accuse Zu An with the worst crime possible. His first reaction was an assassination attempt.

Zu An immediately said, “It looks like you wanted to say this pile of piss, right? Everyone knows that I didn’t come in with anything when I entered the palace, all of the guards along the way can confirm that. Then that means that if it was my accomplice who prepared this bucket of piss, then his clan also needs to be eradicated too, right?”

Shi Kun immediately felt a headache. The one who prepared this bucket was him! Many people in the crown prince’s palace knew about this, he couldn’t hide this fact even if he wanted to. How could he have predicted that his prank would backfire like this?

Zu An was an orphan, and he even divorced Chu Chuyan. He really was alone, so it made no difference to him if he was punished with nine generations of clan eradication. However, he was different! The Shi clan was a huge clan. If they really were involved because of this, then he might be skinned alive!

He could only change his wording and say, “Even if it wasn’t an assassination, everyone saw you splash piss on the crown prince’s body. This is a great crime of disrespect and ought to be punished!”

“Indeed… retch…” That big fatty immediately agreed. He really was beyond grossed out. How could he still remember yesterday’s camaraderie?

Shi Kun laughed. This fella was dead for sure now that he had the crown prince’s support.

Zu An remembered Sang Hong’s warning. This fella indeed inherited his father’s mercilessness and viciousness.

But he also thought of a solution during this time. He used Blue Mallard, and then he sucked away all of the yellow liquid.

To a certain degree, pee was also a type of water after all.

The crown prince was originally entirely drenched, yet he became dry again a moment later. Even the disgusting smell in his mouth disappeared.

A yellow sphere gathered in front of him. It was clearly made of that disgusting liquid.

Zu An waved his hand, and then the ball flew towards Shi Kun’s mouth.

Shi Kun was laughing happily, so his mouth was wide open. How could he react in time? “Ugh… cough cough… retch…”

He clutched his own throat to vomit it out, but he couldn’t make it in time at all. The disgusting smell filled his senses. He could no longer hold back and threw up everything he ate from the night before.

Zu An, you fucking bastard!!!!!

You have successfully trolled Shi Kun for +999 +999 +999…

Unfortunately, he couldn’t say anything right now. His mouth only instinctively retched. This wasn’t it, tears were pouring out of his eyes. Whose fucking piss is this? Why is the smell so strong?!

Zu An didn’t pay him any more attention. He used his skill ‘Befriend a Rich Man’ on the crown prince. A hundred thousand taels of silver instantly vanished just like that, but the crown prince already subconsciously thought of him as a friend.

“This is fun! This is fun!” The crown prince clapped his fat hands. “Big bro, you have to teach me how to do that!”

Zu An sighed in relief when he saw his intimate expression. The last two uses of this ‘Befriend a Rich Man’ didn’t go so well, he never got what he wanted. He was even instinctively worried that he might be scammed this time as well. Fortunately, it finally did something. It looked like this skill wasn’t a complete scam after all.

Shi Kun was stunned. He didn’t know why the crown prince would suddenly no longer blame Zu An. Wasn’t the crown prince pretty petty and easily angered?

“Sure. However, crown prince, please do not call me big bro in the future. This doesn’t conform with the rules.” Zu An was worried that others might use this against him in the future, so it was best if he stopped this earlier.

The crown prince didn’t pay this much attention. “Oh yeah, it’s not only this, you have to teach me how to be invulnerable.”

“Invulnerable?” Zu An was stunned.

The crown prince pointed at Shi Kun and said, “That’s what he said. He said that your cultivation was clearly not high, but even though so many assassins came after you on your way to the capital, they still couldn’t kill you. He said that the reason for that was because you were invulnerable to blades.”

Shi Kun threw up so much he almost threw up his own bile. But he was already at the sixth rank, which made him a high ranking cultivator. He finally used his ki to expel the piss from within him. He carried that bucket and vomited again and again, almost filling it up.

When he heard the crown prince say this, he quickly explained, “Exactly! If the crown prince doesn’t believe me, then have him stand by the door and throw knives at him.”

62d67767f92eb560e77c9100