Lazy Dungeon Master

Haku-san and Misha headed back.

​ Which is why I figured I should start with the all-out remodeling of Orange’s dungeon.

​ When I told Orange that, he just groaned sullenly.

​ “But my dungeon’s survival rate is 0%, nkyuu. I thought it was good…”

​ “That’s also a downside though.”

​ “Is it?”

​ Not one of the beginners made it out alive. That was a good thing as well as a bad thing.

​ As a result of there being no survivors, this place was basically unknown. As said by the saying ‘dead men tell no tales (except undead)’, the number of people coming here never increased.

​ “Nkyuu. Isn’t that a good thing?”

​ “You won’t get DP.”

​ “… Oooh. Right.”

​ There’ll be nothing trying to kill you without enemies coming along, so you could live another day. That’s a good thing.

​ However, without enemies, the dungeon will stall.

​ “By the way, I told Haku-san that you’ll be moving, but we’ll actually be making two or more.”

​ “Really? Nkyuu, wonder if there’s enough DP…”

​ “What, you’ll easily get this much back here on out, don’t worry about it… I’ll be making you a dungeon with a 100% survival rate. For that, I had to guarantee you a location near the capital.”

​ Half a day’s trip at an all-out pace from the capital, double that at a more normal pace. There’ll definitely be repeat visitors.

​ “100% return rate? Can kyuu get DP from that? Wouldn’t kyuu only get DP from the earth vein if kyuu don’t kill anyone?”

​ “You didn’t know? You’ll get DP even if you don’t kill people for as long as they’re in the dungeon.”

​ “… Eh? Really?”

​ Eh, he really didn’t know?

​ “You should be getting a good amount just from Meat and Ichika being here, how is it?”

​ “Seriously…? Seriously!”

​ Guess he looked at his menu. He should already be getting some portion of Meat and Ichika’s daily DP worth.

​ Still though, I thought it was common sense for Dungeon Cores that they’d get daily DP from people. Was I wrong?

​ … Wait. What about the opposite and there’s ways of earning DP that Rokuko doesn’t know about…?

​ Let’s think about that later.

​ “Hoheeh, so kyuu can get DP like this. Convenient~”

​ “Pretty much.”

​ “So dungeons with a 100% survival rate… nkyuu, cram and lock them in?”

​ In truth, the large scale ones are called human farms.

​ “No, you will be locking them in, but you won’t be cramming people in. You’ll make a shop.”

​ “… A shop?”

​ “Wait, Kehma. You’re talking about trading with humans like at our dungeon right? No. 629, can you use humanization?”

​ “Ukyuu… trading, huuuh…. I can’t use it. Kyuu, I might be able to if I reeeeally try, but it’d cost 300,000 DP.”

​ Still petting a rabbit, Rokuko hopped into the conversation. She had a point.

​ Being able to use humanization was like a kind of prestige amongst Dungeon Cores.

​ This was because the Dungeon Cores’ [Father] took the shape of a human and the veteran cores first acquired humanization in order to show respect to him.

​ It was also why Rokuko and Haku-san, who didn’t need to do anything to humanize since that’s how they were from the start, were so disliked.

​ 300,000… so Orange would have to blow the majority of his savings, huh.

​ “Even if you knew humanization, I can’t see it being too beneficial…”

​ “I don’t know either, kyuu. I’ve never done it before!”

​ Orange didn’t have the leeway to spend 300,000 DP on something like that, so that’s just how it would have to be.

​ “Well, there are a number of things that could mimic being human to work in the shop, so it’s not like you have to. Silkies and the like.”

​ “Mmm, wait a sec. Was there anything like that…?”

​ With that, Orange ran his eyes through the empty air. He was probably looking through his catalog from the menu’s function.

​ “No silkies… There’s soldier rabbits though? They can walk and kyuse weapons. Can’t speak humanese, though.”

​ “Ichika, what do you think?”

​ “It’d be hard passin’ ’em off as rabbit beastkin. Pass.”‘

​ Mmm, well, even if they can walk on two legs and carry a spear, they’d still be a rabbit. That’d be a bit much.

​ “Show me your catalog, I want to see your selection.”

​ “Sure thing.”

​ Orange did a few things before a menu suddenly appeared in the air. He was showing me his catalog.

​ … Hmm. His UI was no different from ours. Let’s see… yep, yep. Rabbits really are cheap—I mean, they’re practically all rabbits.

​ The pitfall traps were uselessly cheap. Same with items, there were only cheap ones.

​ Well, I guess Orange was a fundamentally different Dungeon Core from Rokuko. Of course what they could do would differ. Still though, worst case scenario I can just do what I want by purchasing monsters and items myself with his DP and transfer the ownership to Orange. No problem.

​ Oh, maybe he’ll be able to get silkies and the like once he uses humanization? Probably.

​ “Oh, this wererabbit one doesn’t look bad? Misha’s a werecat, so shouldn’t it be able to change into a human too?”

​ “… I-It’s 50,000 DP… a bit much, nkyuu…”

​ Meanwhile, there was no wererabbit in our catalog. And 50,000 DP was so-so.

​ Even from Orange’s point of view, it was around a seventh of his assets.

​ It was definitely a lot, but it was a necessary expense.

​ “I’ll handle the cost if it doesn’t work out, so give it a go.”

​ “Uuu, I will then…! Hikyuuu, I’m super nervous. This is the first time I’ve spent over 10,000, and it’s 50,000…”

​ “Just let ‘er rip man. Go for it.”

​ “Uuu, kyuu’ll really take responsibility if it doesn’t work out right!?”

​ Even while saying that, Orange started to summon a wererabbit.

​ A magic formation around two meters wide appeared.

​ Soon after, a red-haired, rabbit-eared girl appeared with a plop. Contrasting Orange’s ears that hung down, hers were more perky like you’d think a bunny girl’s would be… Fur covered most of her body, like she was wearing a one piece swimsuit despite having no clothes on. Her arms from the elbow down and legs from the knee down were furred as well, like gloves and boots.

​ “Oooh, so she appeared like the other rabbits, nkyuuu… a human rabbit…”

​ “… Umm, nkyu. Hel—I’m pleased to meet you.”

​ “She taaaaalked! She can speak humanese~!”

​ It was all too similar to when I summoned Rei and the others.

​ “Her face is pretty cute, will she work out? Kehma.”

​ “Yeah. She could probably even work at our inn’s reception desk.”

​ If it’s like this, she’s at the level where she could deceive people even without being able to turn into a human.

​ When I looked at her face, her cheeks reddened and she hid her face with her hands. Whoops, excuse me.

​ “Orange, give her a name. A girlish one would be good.”

​ “Eh? Make her a named monster? Well, she cost 50,000 so I guess, nkyuu… hmm… Bloodpool? … Kyuu, no…”

​ The f*ck was that name? Scary.

​ Orange looked up toward Ichika.

​ “Hey, kyuuu there, human. Kyuu named me, so think of another. I don’t even know what a girlish name is, so I’ll leave it to kyuu!”

​ “Huh? Gonna let me decide? … Hmm, how about Strawberry then? She’s pretty red.”

​ “Nkyuu! Alright, kyour name’s Strawberry! Nice to meet kyuu!”

​ “O-Okay, thanks—thank… you!”

​ And what’s with Ichika’s naming sense? Does she only use food for names?

​ Well, I guess Strawberry’s pretty girlish.

​ “So, to what extent can you mimic humans?”

​ “Nkyu! Show him, Strawberry! Show him what kyuu can do!”

​ “Umm… nkyuu, fuah…!”

​ Taking a guts pose and covering her mouth with her fists, Strawberry showed up her transforming into a human. Her ears didn’t change, but the fur covering her arms, legs, and body started going away to look more like a human—wait, clothes, she needs clothes! Eh, you don’t have any? Rabbits don’t usually wear any, you say?

​ I quickly turned my head away from Strawberry to not see her nakedness.

​ “R-Rokuko, please give her some clothes.”

​ “… Kehma. Pervert.”

​ “It was an act of god!”

​ She gave her clothes. I mean, there weren’t any in Orange’s catalog, after all.

​ “By the way, what would the shop sell? Rabbit skewers?”

​ “Nkyuuuu!?!?!? Th-Th-There’s no way I could sell my comrades’ meat though!?”

​ “Oh, don’t worry. You’ll sell rabbits, but not as meat. Guess it’s time I give you an explanation—”

​ And so I began to tell him my plans for the dungeon.