MMORPG: Rise of the Peerless Pumpkinmancer-Novel

Chapter 146: Who’s Homeless?!

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In front of the Chicken Trials Dungeon, many D.L. players were assembled.

They had seen their idol come in and out of the Dungeon so damn often recently!

Just looking at his handsome and resolute visage (cultist vision), they had instantly known that he was up to something great!

"There will be epics about his adventures!"

"Epics? Bullshit! It's gonna be more cheeky videos!"

"Did you hear? Many "pro-gamer" were admitted to the hospital recently…."

"Really?! What happened?! Did they stay too long in the game or something?!"

"You see….After that one Try not to sleep video, they were rushed to the burn unit!"

"Pfft!— That's fucking true! That Pancakes guy slept through all of their fucking highlights!"

But they suddenly froze as if deers in headlights as the dungeon portal showed signs of opening. Their hearts even began to beat faster.

HE was coming!

As Jack and Moon Moon appeared, they rejoiced. Witnessing the duo's triumphant look, they felt tingly all over. As the Demon King glanced their way, they squirmed like Japanese tentacles in a cultural movie.

As Jack opened his mouth, his chiseled jaw trembled, and so did they. It was time for a speech that would make History for sure! Their ears were wide open!

"Log-out!" He muttered.

The purple glow took him away as he disappeared, leaving an awkward silence behind.

"…."

"…."

"…?!"

He was leaving?! Just like that?! What about the victory celebration or even the heroic tales of his adventures?! What about it all?! It appeared he cared for of it…

The fans looked at one another in dismay. Why did they feel like brides abandoned at the altar?!

But at their darkest hour, a man approached, gently tapping their shoulders as if telling them that everything would be okay.

His long blood-red cultist robe instantly made him the center of attention.

"Fear not, my friends. All we need to do is to summon him back." He gave them a warm smile, one that was very contagious. After all, the Demon King cult accepted all.

The man grinned. It was time for the newcomers to master the art of blood reverse-pentagram drawing!

This would be fun….

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As Jack came to his senses, he was ambushed! There was a finger gently but relentlessly poking him. He slowly removed his helmet, with the culprit acting innocent.

"Oh, you're back!" Lilly exclaimed as she came closer, her eyes glistering with curiosity. "Did something good happen?"

"Plenty of great things happened. Not only am I still alive but—"

"That's not what I meant! You're grinning like a complete fool!" She remarked, giving him an inquisitive glare. "Did you get a girlfriend?!"

A scene instantly resurfaced his mind.

"I've found and completed a Hidden Dungeon. I even got myself a Necromancy grimoire!" He promptly answered, giving her a teasing look. "Impressed yet?"

"As expected of my brother!" She approvingly and exaggeratedly thundered before looking him right in the eyes.

"You know, it's fine to play with zombies, but make sure you don't become one IRL. Can you promise me that?" She knew he had barely slept or eaten in the previous days.

"Alright, but only because you're the one asking." He did his best pouting expression, making her clutch her stomach as she giggled.

"Pfft— really now?! Trying to act cute?!…" but she suddenly jerked in shock.

"Oh, right, before I forget! No screwing with the undead! I heard it's a plague in other 18+ VR games!" She exclaimed, looking dead serious.

Where the hell was this coming from?!

"You don't have to worry!" He gave her a reassuring glance. But then he kept going…

"You can be at ease. I'm far too low level to summon myself a cute undead waifu just yet." He winked at her, chuckling at her shocked expression.

"Y-yet?! That's not what I meant?!"

"Anyway, guess it's time for my anti-zombie daily exercise. Want to join me on a walk? Maybe grab a bite too." He expertly changed the topic.

"Sure! I'm getting my coat!"A second later, she was already by their door, ready to go, her face glowing with child-like happiness.

As they walked the quiet streets, he glanced her way.

She wore an awesome long black jacket that gave her a distinguished air. So what if it was an imitation? It looked freaking amazing on her!— Well, in his eyes anyway.

Jack knew as much about fashion as Moon Moon did.

Still, even he could tell that his outfit looked horrendous in comparison—faded jeans with holes and a coat worthy of a homeless guy.

The two made an incredible clash, one that a few passersby were happy to point out:

"Tch— What's with that guy?"

"How the heck did such a bloke get a girlfriend as pretty as her?!"

"Look at him. There's just no way! I bet she wouldn't touch him with a ten-foot pole!"

"Hey, what if he's blackmailing her or something?! Do you think we should call the cops?!"

They didn't even bother to lower their voices.

Her cute forehead wrinkled as she frowned in displeasure. What the hell did these guys know?! At this moment, she wanted to very gently stick her foot down their throat… until they choked to death!

"Don't worry about them. There will always be idiots in this world. They're just a fart: disgusting and worthless." Jack gently patted her head, ignoring the fools.

Coming back to her senses, she grabbed his hand and resolutely walked away in a random direction, expecting things to end there. But for some reason, three youngsters followed them.

They seemed well-off as they wore what seemed to be branded clothes. They were already pointing at the two of them while angrily shouting:

"Hey, let go of her hand, you bastard!"

"This district doesn't welcome your kind!"

"Go back to the fucking slums where you belong!"

Jack suddenly jerked up in shock as he glanced at Lilly. His expression was one of disbelief:

"Did you hear that?! They said there are more of my kind in the slum. Is that even possible?! Since when are the slums filled with handsomely rugged dashing men?!"

Lilly's face went from twitching in anger to twitching trying to hold her laughter.

"Pfft— I think they're just confused. They probably got lost while looking for the nearest gay bar." She gently explained.

In the background, the youngsters were turning purple. They couldn't take it anymore! They charged over, overcome by anger, only to suddenly stop in their tracks.

Jack had a thousand ways to intimidate them. But why waste time? He had his phone out and looked very casual.

"Hello, police! I'd like to signal a robbery in progress. Right at the corner of main street and fifth. Three of them! One's wearing a blue shirt with a small crocodile on it, with—"

That's all he had to say. The miscreants were already running away at full speed.

Being overly pampered definitely turned some into complete imbeciles. At least in Infinite, he could directly slaughter them…

"Shall we go?" Lilly gently tugged on his hand.

He nodded, accompanying her. Her steps were so springy and full of vitality. He'd make sure she'd always remain that energetic.

That's when she sent him a teasing glance:

"By the way, the next time you call the police, you should probably turn your phone on." She chuckled.

"Lots of stuff happened in-game. It can't be helped that I forgot to charge it." He shrugged helplessly.

ˉ_(ツ)_/ˉ

"What were you going to do if it turned into a fight?" She asked curiously.

"Whoop their asses, what else?" Why was she even asking?

"Oh, maybe castration…" She mumbled.

"Damn, girl!!" He choked.

How could such a sweet girl think of doing such a vile thing?! Then again, he wasn't one to talk given his "aim" back in the Dungeon.

Still, this just proved how angry she had been and how highly she thought of him. He truly was lucky!

"Shall we go?" Her smile was ever-so radiant.

She was obviously heading toward the cheaper side of town. It was filled with plenty of hole-in-the-wall restaurants. The food there was godly!

The cooks honed their craft through years of hard work and dedication. It was the best quality/price ratio ever, and only a madman would look down on them.

Normally, he would have been the first to head there, but he had a different purpose this time. After all, he now had some credits to his name from selling Infinite gear.

After all, the many runs he did while farming reviews had actually given him mad loot!

CPR dude had been the one taking care of the sales while he was busy and now it was all neatly sitting in his account!

It was hard to check the exact amount with a dead phone (x_x), but he'd have plenty for now.

"Follow me. We're going somewhere else," Jack uttered, with Lilly giving him a perplexed look.

He couldn't wait to see her reaction…

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[A/N] February Mass Release Mood! Are you ready to be buried in chapters? Hehe ^_^

Thoughts about cute undead waifus? =P

(Reminder: check Chapter 0 for details!)