Martial King's Retired Life

“Pops, you got it wrong. I am…”

It would be really shameless if I called myself Shaman Monarch when I was a fraud. While I was busy trying to think of how to introduce myself without making myself contemptible, Hong Jiu voiced, “You courting death, old man? Would you dare object if my leader has eyes for your daughter? You’re blessed he’s sparing her a glance.”

Where did you learn to play thug?! You scared the lights out of her mother – literally!

Despite looking malnourished, Yangyang’s father sped into the kitchen to grab a whip. Yangyang hastily stopped him and explained the whole story. Only once his nerves were unknotted did he notice the group of people attired in white garments.

The corners of Yangyang’s father’s lips stretched closer and closer to his ears, culminating in him diving into me as though he was shooting for a takedown. “Divine Sun! Divine Bird! This peasant finally has the honour of meeting you! Your Majesty, please accept three bows from this old one!”

Okay, you can kowtow if you want to kowtow, but can you not try to submit my leg?!

“Your Majesty, you have no idea how harsh life in our village is!”

“I will hear you out. Let go now, or I will uncork a No Shadow Kick!”

He finally let go, then enthused to his wife, “Honey, look! His Majesty Shaman Monarch has arrived! Our days of suffering are finally over!” And… he shocked her back to sleep…

I instructed everyone to wait outside, but they were allowed to listen in outside if they wished. Yangyang’s father told me the village was never large, but it was never so rundown and used to be populated. Only in recent years did things start making a turn for the worse, beginning with the drought that started two years ago. Wanyu then conscripted over half of their young men to build their military, which was reasonable; however, Wanyu was famous for rewarding its soldiers handsomely. That was why young men kept leaving the village even when they weren’t conscripted, leaving the village bereft of capable workers.

“Even if there is a drought, you are not that far from the river. Why did you not opt for irrigation?”

It only took me a day on foot to travel from the previous village to this one. Even if it was excruciatingly taxing, would they really not bother stepping out of their village if their lives were at risk?

“That is because… you are His Majesty Shaman Monarch.”

“Can you explain?”

“You can summon winds and rain, not to mention all the able people under you. Nobody would dare to stand in your way, but we…”

I pulled my brows together. “I remember you mentioned highwaymen. Are they part of your concern?”

“Yes, Your Majesty. If a drought was our only problem, we could gather herbs or hunt as we have plenty of both locally. Unfortunately, two years ago… a gang of highwaymen called a place nearby home, demanding we supply them with food and fur. You know how cold-blooded they are in Xiacang Anxi. They are inhumane; they are carnivores who even drink blood. Luckily, they left without any complications after we supplied what they asked for. A new group has come, though, and, unlike the previous group, this group assaults anyone they see, vandalises any buildings they come across, as well as loot anything they can find within. They are the ones who turned our village into this state…”

Highwaymen were a major problem for all of Xiacang Anxi, the nightmare of commoners. There’s not a crime imaginable that they would refrain from committing. Feng Xue’s martial prowess was only one reason he was revered. The other reason he was regarded so highly was owed to the time he coordinated a nation-wide sweep with the eleven states of Nanjiang. The bandits must’ve chosen to return to Nanjiang since he had retired.

“They are feared everywhere in Xiacang Anxi. The next time they come might be our last day alive. Fortunately, there is no need to fear anymore,” Yangyang’s father gave a heartfelt smile, “because you have arrived! You will use your abilities to help us, right?”

I reactively nodded due to the way Yangyang’s father looked at me.

As our conversation went on, more and more people congregated in the courtyard to listen in. What flabbergasted me was that among those who prostrated themselves on the ground as they cried out in Nanjiang’s language were people from my two hundred followers. Even though I couldn’t comprehend what they were voicing, their eyes told me they were imploring me to help them.

Knowing it was my cue to create a miracle, I sent off everyone but Iron and Wood Guardians so that I could inquire, “Hey, what do you two think? What do I need to do?”

I didn’t really know what entailed “make it rain”. For all I knew, Shaman Monarch might’ve left behind some secret method to make it rain if the legends claimed he had the power to.

“In my opinion, you should move on to the next village – now.”

I furrowed my brows. “What?”

“Your Majesty, perhaps you are unaware, but there are countless villages you will see facing the same ordeals. We do not have the capacity and luxury to save every village. Your schedule is already full as it is. If you are to exercise punctuality, now is the time to move on.”

“That wasn’t my question. My question was what ideas you have. To speak more accurately, how are you two going to help me create a ‘miracle’? Your Great Spirit Shaman sent you here to assist me, which means you must know what to do, correct?”

They bobbed their heads.

“I already gave my word to help. How do I create the miracle? How do I make it rain? How do I deal with the bandits?”

Both of them replied together, “We suggest you head to the next vill-”

“I don’t like arguing about the same thing over and over. What I say is final; who is going to help me?”

Iron Guardian absentmindedly answered, “It is not easy to make it rain. At the very least, it is beyond you.”

Wood Guardian added, “Do you know how many highwaymen there are in Wanyu alone? Accost them in the most trivial way, and the consequences will blow you mind. How are you going to deal with them?”

“Just give me an upfront response.” Having taken a moment to study their visages, it clicked for me. “It’s Ol’ Ge’s orders, isn’t it?”

My frigid tone clearly ruffled their feathers. Howbeit, they remained silent.

“He told you to leave me to abandon me when I need help, correct? He wants me to lose credibility, forcing me to abdicate on my own accord, correct?” Their silence answered the question for me. “Are you two joking right now? You’re the ones who preached giving hope to people with miracles and to improve their lives. You’re the ones who stressed to mind my manners and words so that I don’t blaspheme Shaman Monarch’s reputation in their eyes. You four guardians are supposed to safeguard the religion. So, what you’re telling me is all that is just bollocks? To please Great Spirit Shaman, you’re okay with sacrificing your own people?”

I pointed outside and went on, “Those people waiting outside for rain and their hero are your followers. They’re not a substitute like I am; they’re your lifetime followers. They live frugal lives, deprive their kids of better lives and deprive themselves of enjoyment so that they can donate to you. Are you telling me that you’re going to walk off on them despite knowing they’ll be in peril? You might as well kill them now to simplify matters and save them from prolonged suffering.”

I could almost hear Wood Guardian crushing her teeth. In the end, though, it was Iron Guardian who spoke up. “Thank you for your enlightenment, Your Majesty. Still, I need to remind you that not everyone possesses your authority and courage. At the very least, I was not endowed with them… I shall assume your silence is tacit agreement to follow my proposal.”

Iron Guardian exited the house to announce my subsequent schedule. While he kept his tone neutral, the crowd drowned out his voice with their loud cursing. It wasn’t hard to imagine the villagers’ rage and disappointment, but they could only gnash their teeth. The last thing they would’ve expected is to hear their messiah turn his back on them when they had been praying he’d come to their aid.

“… His Majesty has decided…” Iron Guardian abruptly paused for a while. “… Due to your needs, His Majesty has changed his mind. He will be staying to help you.”

I didn’t need to have mind-reading abilities to know how shocked Iron Guardian was deep down.

(If you aren’t endowed with courage and authority, allow me to give you them. Remember this for the rest of your life: pick your fights.)

Iron Guardian could feel the thin threads manipulating his body against his will. All he could do was stare at me.

I ambled out of the property, then offered the villagers a polite smile. “You have all suffered greatly. I shall hereby reward all of you to relax. I shall grant you the honour of watching me perform a miracle.” I eyed Iron Guardian and elaborated, “I shall show you flying humans.”