My Servant Is An Elf Knight From Another World

Wine And Dine

Up high above to the second-story was where our table was reserved, and somehow the second level had far surpassed the ground floor both in presentation and scope.

The lady navigated us through countless occupied tables, winding and slithering through, allowing us a brief moment to take in the magnificent sight that practically begged to be marveled at.

All four walls that surrounded the lavish interior were enamored with golden frames, where life-like paintings of many shapes and sizes loomed over the dozens of equally lavish-looking patrons already partaking in the middle of an expansive feast.

A large bar, with a bartender juggling too many glasses to even count. On one end, playing atop a dimly-lit stage, was a live jazz performance starring an actual well-renowned group notorious around these parts.

Weeks ago, if you were to come up to me and tell me that I’d be moving up in the world, I’d have laughed at your face all the way to hell and back. Pretty sure it was like one of the fundamental universal rules of life.

Pretty sure there’s a passage that God has written there somewhere going something like: ‘Thou shall not befall fortune onto the spineless, if otherwise, thou shall literally become spineless. Go on and try it, I ain’t playing.’

In any case, being able to take a single step into this place, let alone dine in it, was like a pipedream come to life.

Just a week ago, I’d go broke from just taking a sip of water here… now though? Well… thank God for Dr. Ria and her magical healing elixir that wasn’t in any way at all the least bit suspicious whatsoever.

.....

So far Ash was sharing much of the wonder I had for the extravagancy that paved every square-inch of the place to the point where if she flutters those ears of hers any faster, she’d be hovering to the skies.

Playing follow the leader with reservation-lady was good and all, but I’m growing a bit tired of nearly bumping into tables with every sharp turn that abruptly came our way. Perhaps I should learn from past mistakes and actually start asking questions for once.

Certainly wouldn’t kill me to try.

“Excuse me,” I said, letting myself be heard above the saxophone solo. “Mind pointing out where exactly we’ll be sitting?”

“Oh, won’t be long now, actually,” She responded, sounding apologetic. “You’re booked to the VIP table. Unfortunately, it’s quite a ways away, but we’re getting close.”

I stopped moving at once. Ash stopped moving too. And reservation-lady, noticing her little posse had frozen still like a statue, also followed suit.

“Something wrong, Mr. Elf Sir?” She asked.

Oh, something was definitely wrong, alright. “Yeah, um… firstly drop the Elf part. Secondly, you said VIP table? Pretty sure we booked a normal table, actually. Sure you ain’t reading off of someone else’s reservation there?”

With a frown, the bemused young lady referred back to her notepad in hand, tapping rhythmically away at its contents, before smiling slightly and saying with a shake of the head, “You’re right. There has been a mix-up on tables. I’m terribly sorry for the inconvenience. Listen, I’ll go check with my manager downstairs, and I’ll get back to you in a moment, is that alright?”

A simple mistake that was brushed aside with a wave of my hand. These things happen, after all. “No problem. We’ll just be here.”

After another remorse-ridden apology, she strode off in a hurry down the steps and disappeared out of sight within a second’s notice.

“Something the matter?” asked Ash, who barely was able to follow along with the conversation.

“Got the wrong reservation, it seems. Gonna have to wait till she finds us a table,” I replied.

“Oh?” Ash looked around, a frown gradually showing on her face. “But I see many that sit unoccupied, couldn’t we simply just…?”

“Uhh, okay, Ash… the definition of reservation is?”

Her eyes focused briefly onto one spot, her brow furrowing more and more by the second.

“May I refrain from answering that?” She muttered quietly. “I fear that I may only be subjecting myself to more of your mockeries should I give you my answer.”

I smirked. “Hey, promise I won’t laugh.”

“Liar.”

Okay. Seems like I wasn’t the only one learning from past mistakes here. Clever girl.

“Back! I’m back!”

Huffing and puffing, hands on her knees, reservation-lady strode back into view with a teeth-baring smile and good news riding at the tip of her tongue.

“Sorry for the wait, but I’ve got your table all sorted out now. I’ve consulted with my manager and he’s got everything set out for you just right!”

“Alright, sweet… appreciate the help,” I said.

She grinned again. “Yep. So now if you would just follow me, I’ll get you set up on our best table at the executive lounge.”

“Kay, right, well Ash… you heard the lady. Let’s go on ahead to the executive – ” I paused momentarily, rewinding and replaying in my head what the heck had just befallen upon my hearing. “Sorry, say again?”

“The executive lounge.”

“The executive lounge?!”

The executive lounge.

A secluded room located in the comfiest corner of the premises available only for the elitist of the elite. A room with the best view, best seats, best lightning, basically the best of the best for every best solely for the very best.

Or at least that’s what the website advertised.

Walking in, taking in everything at first glance, I can tell you this much… they won’t be getting sued for false advertising anytime soon. The view could do with a little work, it was still a bit bleak and dark there outside. Though I suppose the service industry can only do so much when it comes to the weather, can’t really wish the thunder clouds away.

The next few minutes were essentially just me acting on autopilot as I try my best to process what the heck is happening in the here and now.

Like, why were our seats being pulled out for us? Why was it did we have our own personal waiter and waitress standing by at the sidelines? Why… why oh why, I wonder… why this was happening to us specifically?

Reservation-lady just walked away after reaffirming for the umpteenth time that she was just following orders and that everything was rightfully in order.

Meaning to say, this was exactly where we were meant to be.

So be it.

Menu in hand, I stared at our selections for the night. So many delectable delights, yet I couldn’t focus on any single one of them. I wasn’t lying before when I said I was famished, but it seemed as if curiosity itself was staving away my hunger and in turn, was growing an appetite of its own, a craving.

A craving for answers.

Ash, for her part, remained blissfully unaware of the utter absurdity that was the past five minutes… couldn’t really blame her, I was the one here well-versed with the ongoings of modern life, she probably was under the impression that everything was as it should be, that everything was going according to plan.

When in actuality it really wasn’t. Didn’t got no blueprint for this, don’t even think this had anything to do with any scheme of Ria’s.

But yet… still we’re here. How did this happen?

“Master, have a look here,” Ash beamed at me over the top of her menu, twirling it around to face me and baring it wide. “Here it actually lists a wide variety of cheese types, It’s as you say! Mozzarella, Brie, Parmesan… Cheddar! Cheddar bears a striking resemblance to corn flakes, perhaps I should… no, actually, Master, what would you suggest is best?”

Her enthusiasm, the eagerness in her voice, they both proved to be very infectious.

I smiled back, trying my absolute best to cast aside the questions that were burning within me, and answer while maintaining my tone more on the lighter side. “Maybe have something along with it too, yeah? Get some spaghetti, sausage, and maybe some… woah, woah, woah – what’s this?!”

Two wine glasses, a chilled bottle of wine, without warning was placed and poured out halfway before I was given chance to intervene, both waiter and waitress staring back at me with their heads angled sideways.

Why was I the one getting the sideways treatment? Am I the one going crazy here? Even Ash was raising a questioning brow at me.

“Who – maybe there’s a mistake somewhere, but I didn’t order this,” I pointed out, my finger pressing against the cold hard brand of wine. “This is a thousand excluding taxes, I saw it on the menu, and even if I could afford it… Newsflash: I don’t drink.”

“Not to worry,” spoke the waiter.

“It’s complimentary,” finished the waitress.

“A courtesy from the manager himself,” The waiter smiled.

“The manager adores new arrivals,” piped the waitress.

“He really does.”

“Savor the drink he says.”

“Along with your beautiful date.”

“Don’t spoil the mood.”

“Order your food.”

“And do enjoy your evening with us,” they both finished in unison.

What in the fuck. If they actually rehearsed that, well played. If they didn’t – then aliens. What the hell.

Rehearsed or not though, something was definitely off here. There was no hiding my concern any longer, it surfaced… and it showed, and I was about to make it heard.

There were these seven words I’d never thought I’d say. I forbid myself from ever uttering those accursed syllables, that dreaded statement, but the time calls for some drastic measures to be made… and this was drastic indeed.

I glanced over at Ash, and saw apprehension welling up in those shimmering emerald eyes of hers – eyes that were once teeming with joy. Wasn’t about to let a little bizarreness ruin such a special occasion. I had to say it.

So I did.

“I want to speak to your manager.”

Smiles on both faces. Bows with both heads. “Very well,” They both said, then they both left.

Ash and I shared a bewildering stare, but before any one of us could say a word to one another, the sound of one’s footsteps slowly crept its way into audibility.

Unsurprisingly, Ash was the first to pick up on it, her ears for once keeping still and perked.

One step. Two steps. Then a thud.

One step. Two steps. Then a thud.

That thud wasn’t of anything significant to me, but to Ash, to her ears… it made all the difference. She looked over at me, a peculiar expression on her face, saying, ” The slam of a cane, getting more prominent with every step. I can hear it.”

“A cane?” I repeated, turning towards the door.

“Yes, I believe…” Ash said. “I believe their superior... is limping.”

.....

It clicked. It finally clicked for me. Clicked. Just as the door swung wide, just as another thud reverberated against the wooden floor, just as I stood up, ready to bolt.

These past few weeks, it was easy to forget that the everyday didn’t all brim with magic and mythical creatures alike. It was easy to forget that the mundane itself held its own secrets deep within the underbelly of society’s eyes.

The everyday didn’t have dragons soaring through the air, it didn’t have demons ravaging the city streets.

No, what we did have instead were blackmails, bribes, fronts… our own version of evil didn’t breathe fire, they didn’t have horns – instead, they run thriving businesses, they wear suits… some also may wield canes.

It was difficult to try and compare the lesser of the two evils, but right then, it really didn’t matter. Evil has arrived.

The Mob Boss has come to say hi.