My Servant System

Chapter 700 699: Self Reflection

"See? If you maintain a constant output like this, it becomes easier to fluctuate it at your will instead of at random. Starting at a lower output and harnessing it completely and expertly makes far more progress then trying to do the same instantly at a higher output. Building blocks used to create a strong foundation to eventually erect a tall, solid tower. If the foundation is weak, that tower can be pushed over and collapse."

I nodded as I began to ease the mana out of my Core, stamping down on it and cutting it off gradually instead of instantly, wanting to further grasp my control and be able to understand just how to use it at a higher level.

Even with my System, and with the skill I had to further my control over my mana, doing it myself helped me make the improvements more than just surface level, instead going deep inside and becoming real, meaningful progression that would make the rest of my life easier.

That isn't to say that my control wasn't already great; it was damn near superb, but like most things in life, it felt like there was something better waiting just around the corner, and in this case, that something as Kolia showing me the difference between just enchanting something and making a work of art with my enchantments, and to do so I needed to switch from a normal number two pencil to a suite of lead pencils ranging from .3mm to 3mm, giving me a wider array of tools to use to create a masterpiece.

It was hard to not be entirely demoralized by the knowledge that I had been doing things so inefficiently and that there was another way to do enchanting far better than I could have ever imagined, but I just pushed down on that demoralization and instead allowed my childish joy for learning more about magic in all its wondrous, confusing facets to take rein and infuse me with the passion that I had been lacking for this subject.

Though, on that same vein, it was hard to not think that after so long in this world, I had only come so far... 51 and a half levels in a few years felt so, so slow, but at the same time...

Was it not an enormous amount of experience that I had gained, both for my System and for my own self?

Had I not gone through intense things over these years?

It felt like it had gone by in a flash; the years since I was a child to being a 'teen' and then a woman almost in my prime again?

So much had happened, and at the same time it felt like there had been long periods of time - like now - where nothing was happening...

It all blurred together sometimes, while at others it felt like I could recall each and every single day since I found myself in that void, my progression from just a normal, average girl into someone who could kill without batting an eye... and even enjoyed it.

This System of mine could do so much for me, and it had done so much for me, but sometimes I feel like I do nothing using it, instead just going for everything with my own two hands, wanting to make that progress myself and not rely on some outside force to mold me into something without much input from myself besides what I think I wanted.

Just having things given to me because I had a System felt wrong, but on the other hand it was such an untapped resource...

I mean, I had a plethora of Shop Points waiting to be used, and I could definitely find some tools or materials to aid myself right here, right now with my enchanting, but I didn't use them.

Should I?

Or should I keep trucking forwards on my own, relying on my own two feet and hands to travel the distance and create something for myself?

Something made from my own blood, sweat and tears as I toiled endlessly in this second life of mine?

It was an enigma, and as I stared down at the book in front of me, the one that Kolia had placed in front of me flooded with theories and notes from previous enchanters, I took a deep breath and cleared my mind, wanting to figure out the answer to my more pressing dilemma first.

Again, on one hand the progress made myself meant more, had more value in practice, and would give me that solid foundation that Kolia was talking about, but on the other I had an infinite treasure trove of incredible wealth waiting for me to tap into it, and I would be an absolute buffoon to not stick my grubby, greedy little paws into it whenever I could.

Perhaps I needed to peruse the Shop again to figure out just what could fit into my paws and not 'ruin' all of my hard work by making far too much of my endeavors meaningless or cheapening the future endeavors too much.

That answer was simple, but the larger question was if I would purchase solely materials, materials and items, or if I would also purchase techniques related to enchanting inside the Shop; something that I had been ignoring for a long time now was the category inside the Shop dedicated to spells and martial arts that would be guides and fonts of knowledge.

Should I use them..?

Another breath as I tapped my finger against the pages in front of me went in and out as I thought for another moment, only to shake my head slightly as I decided that - while I would love to answer that question now - I needed to see the Shop in greater depth to make an accurate decision that I was assured of.

"Kat? Are you alright?"

I looked towards my mentor and nodded, smiling softly as I said "Yes, just thinking. This theory here, the one that says creating visible threads from your mana to not only feel but see your abilities? If one were to do this, but instead-"

The library was quiet save for our voices as we traded ideas and questions, my attention placed back entirely on the matter of becoming a better enchantress and nothing else.

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Felt like this warranted a real note and not being placed below; what do you guys think about the current state of the ? 

These bursts of action separated by lulls of Slice of Life stuff?

I feel more comfortable and in my element with SoL, but at the same time, like I wrote with Kat, I feel like these 700 chapters are just... fluff most of the time; I'm proud of my fluff, I love my fluff, but is it really worth charging people money for?

It's just something that's been weighing on my mind recently, so I wanted to hear it from you, the readers, who are spending money and/or time on this book; are you happy and enjoying this as it is, or does it feel like I need to change and begin writing more of the 'story'?

Go quicker with the Fiends, with Jillian, with the Gold and Silver creatures from so long ago?

Or is the pace fine, and this has become something of a comfort to read just like it's a comfort for me to write?

Anyways, yeah, I just felt like that was weighing on my mind, so...

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