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Chapter 49 : Misgivings
*Sasha*
I snuggled into him, still panting, and kissed his shoulder.
Lucas feathered soft kisses over my hair. “Goddess, it only keeps getting better."
“Mhm," I agreed breathlessly.
“I love you, Sasha baby," Lucas whispered, and when I tipped my head up, he captured my lips in a passionate kiss.
We were going to make love again, now. I knew that, even before Lucas rolled me underneath him once more. I
didn't know if we were ever going to get enough of each other.
After our third time, though, we both decided we needed to sleep. Lucas laid on his back and tucked me into his
side, my cheek resting on his shoulder.
He was soon snoring, but I was thinking about the trickle of his satisfaction I could feel between my legs. Lucas
hadn't pulled out once.
Was I going to be up to my eyeballs in babies soon?
I chewed my lip. I wasn't sure I wanted that… well, not now, anyway. Holding Lucas's baby in my arms was not a
bad thought, but one that was unwelcome right now. I had things I still wanted to do. I wanted to complete my
degree and become a Royal Engineer.
The quest we were on was already delaying that, and I had no idea how long I'd be derailed. But I did know I didn't
think I wanted to be swollen with child by the time we got back to the Dark Realm.
I sighed and began scooting away from Lucas. I needed to think.
“Mmm… Sasha baby?" Lucas murmured, making a sleepy grab for my arm.
“I'm just going to walk around the deck a little bit," I said softly, giving him a soft kiss. “Don't worry. I'll be back soon.
You rest."
“Hmmm… go with you?" Lucas asked.
I hesitated. Did I want Lucas to come with me? I needed some alone time with my thoughts. But I also didn't want
to hurt his feelings.
"Actually, I was hoping to be alone for a bit," I said, trying to sound as gentle as possible.
Lucas blinked his sleepiness away. “That sounds ominous. Is everything okay, Sasha? Did I do something wrong?" he
asked, his voice laced with concern.
"No, no, of course not, Lucas," I reassured him, placing a hand on his chest. "I just need to clear my head. You know
how I get sometimes. Just… I want to be alone for a little bit, okay? I really will be back soon."
Follow on NovᴇlEnglish.nᴇtLucas nodded his understanding and then captured my hand and kissed my wrist. “Don't make any big decisions
without me, okay?"
“Okay," I promised, and I kissed him again before sliding out of bed and pulling on a robe.
I hoped Lucas would get back to sleep, but I also doubted he would. If he'd told me he “needed to think," I'd be
awake like it was mid-afternoon. I really didn't want him to worry, but I needed this.
I slipped on a pair of flats and made my way up to the deck. There were lanterns going here and there to help the
nighttime crew see, but they were hardly necessary. The moon was large and round in the sky. The stars shone like
little licks of flame in the darkness.
Pulling the robe around me against the bracing wind, I went to the railing and stared down at the black sea, the
moonlight reflecting on the crest of every wave.
The mate bond was more powerful with every passing second. All I wanted was for Lucas to hold me, touch me,
make love to me. It blasted every other thought out of my head. Lucas was the new center of my universe.
It frightened me.
How was I going to tell Lucas I didn't want to be a mom and wife yet?
I put a hand on my lower belly, knowing the risks we kept taking in that department. I hoped I wasn't already
pregnant.
I really did need to talk to him about condoms or pulling out or… something. We weren't exactly in a position for me
to go get birth control, given all the traveling we were doing.
Maybe when we got to the Winter Forest I could visit a pharmacy and pick something up. But I wasn't going to do it
behind Lucas's back. No, we needed to have a serious conversation.
Feet padded along the deck behind me.
“Lucas," I said, “we… we need to talk."
When there was no answer, I turned around and jumped.
“Hello, Sasha," the old man who'd invaded my dreams and visions said.
His eyes flashed red in the shadows, but I could see he was smiling. I felt my heart pounding, and my feet tried to
back up as he took a step forward.
“Y-you," I gaped. I looked around, but somehow we were alone. There was not one crewmember to be seen.
“Yes, me. Somebody's been naughty," the man tsked.
I turned to run, only to find myself colliding right into him. How had he moved so fast?
I scurried backward and swallowed against the increasing fear that crawled up my throat. “How are you here?
What do you… what do you want?" I stammered.
“I just don't think it was a good idea to let you mess around with the Slipstone as long as you have."
I gulped. “I don't have it right now."
“Oh, I know. It's with your mate," the man replied. “I'm perfectly fine with him having it. It's not as though he can do
anything with it."
“I… what did I do wrong?" I asked.
The man shrugged. “If I told you that, you'd just keep screwing things up for me. No, I think it's time we bid you
farewell, dream dancer."
“Bid… what are you going to do to me?" I squeaked.
“Oh, I've heard drowning isn't a bad way to go," the man said.
I looked behind me at the now ominous dark water. “Please, don't...."
The man raised his hands and the wind picked up.
I wasn't going to hang around to see what happened next. I turned from the rail and began running across the
deck. “Lucas!" I cried. “Lucas, help!"
Rain fell like icy daggers from the sky, and the wind blew me back, even as my feet slid on the rough wood of the
deck.
“He can't help you now, 'princess.'" The man chuckled, twisting his wrist so the wind became like a wall, pushing me
back toward the railing.
I fought it, fought the storm, fought the wind. I conjured my own dream dancer powers and pushed back, trying to
make the rain stop and the wind die down.
As I started to make a little progress, the man twisted his hands again, and it became a war of wills.
He may have wanted to drown me, but I didn't want to die. And I'd be damned if I went down without a fight....
The man growled and summoned more of his power, perhaps as much as he had, and brought the storm to a
head, adding lightning to his repertoire.
I managed to dodge the crash of the lightning, feeling the sizzle against my back. It burned a hole in the deck. I
glared at the man and conjured something of my own, hitting him with hail.
Whatever he was doing to keep the crew away, to keep us in our own little world, must have been very draining,
because I was slowly gaining the upper hand. As the man was driven to his knees by my hail, I walked over to him,
moving my own hands in a bid to blow him overboard.
“How do you like it?" I snapped, pushing both hands at him and conjuring the wind.
The man grimaced. “This is so undignified," he sighed.
Then, he disappeared....
I looked all around me, noting the storm had died down, but the crew still wasn't back. That must have meant he
was still here, somewhere.
Follow on Novᴇl-Onlinᴇ.cᴏmI sensed a presence behind me, but it was too late. As I whirled around, the man gave me a hard knock to the head
with the heel of a dagger.
“So undignified," he repeated distastefully and, as I staggered, holding my head and watching the world spin, he
grabbed me by the hair.
“Ngh," I groaned, seeing more stars than just the ones in the sky. “Let me go!" I tried twisting away, but my world
swam and I had no choice but to let him drag me across the deck.
“I haven't had to do something this barbaric in eons," the man muttered, grabbing my upper arms and dragging
me up over the railing.
I kneed him in the balls.
The man grunted, cupping himself. “You are such a pain in the ass."
I struggled to get down from on top of the railing.
The man gave an evil smile and held up his hand.
I slipped on a sudden patch of ice as he disappeared again.
As I tumbled over the side of the ship, screaming my head off, I just barely saw a flash of Lucas running across the
deck.
“Lucas!" I shouted for him as the inky black sea rushed toward me. The sharp salty sting of its embrace knocked
the wind out of me, and I couldn't see a thing as I fought against the current of the ship's wake to make it back to
the surface.
When the freezing air hit my skin, I hungrily sucked in several breaths.
I heard the boat's engines whirling and I felt myself being pulled further away into the open sea.
I flailed around, trying to swim my way back to the boat, but I didn't know which way to go. The seawater stung my
eyes and impaired my vision, so I couldn't even see the outline of the ship.
I opened my mouth to cry out for help but was knocked back beneath the surface by a sudden wave… and then
everything went black.
***
I opened my eyes with a sharp gasp. Everything around me was cold and dark and I felt myself floating in the air.
Had I died?
“You are not dead, Sasha," a warm voice echoed around me.
I saw a sliver of light emerge from the darkness getting wider and brighter as I floated toward it. I tried to remain
calm and in a flash, I found myself in a vast, silver landscape, with a large, glowing, silver orb hanging above me.
The Moon Goddess was standing in front of me, her silver hair flowing down her back like a waterfall. Her eyes were
a deep blue and seemed to hold the entire universe within them.
“Welcome back, Sasha," the Moon Goddess said, her voice like the wind. “I have been expecting you."
“Expecting me?" I asked, confused. “Where am I and why am I here?"