The Abandoned Empress

He whispered, kissing her again when she was breathing hard. Her eyes were blurred with tears at his confession. There was the sound of them taking off their clothes. In the end, tears flowed from her eyes.

While trying to feel deep inside her heart the body heat of the man she loved, she tightly hugged his neck with a trembling hand.

“Why are you here? I clearly told you to go back to your original knights division.”

“…”

Beatrice put her hand on her throbbing heart, looking silently at Gillian who remained silent at her harsh rebuking.

‘How foolish you are!’

As she couldn’t stand seeing the turbulent emotions in his brown eyes, she turned coldly, ignoring him.

Once she got inside her carriage she noticed a marigold subtly wrapped in a handkerchief. Feeling choked up with emotions, she touched its yellow petals silently.

‘He gave me this as a sign of farewell, then why did he follow me?’

The next day after she slept with him, she found a single marigold at her bedside.

She didn’t know how much she cried after seeing that flower meaning the sadness of separation. Actually, she left the palace feeling so sad at the thought that she would never come back. She was so sad that she couldn’t feel upset about her father’s intentional failure to see her off.

“A stupid man… ”

If she was not chosen as the crown prince’s wife, it was certain that her father would push her to be his concubine, given his wild temper. Either way, it was a fait accompli that she would be the crown prince’s woman, which made her heartbroken all the more.

Of course, even if Sir Feden stayed in the kingdom, it would be difficult for him to revive his fallen family, but she felt it was not right for him to follow her. What’s the point of following her when he would be more heartbroken if he did so?

‘I should not lose my mind now.’

She made a determined look, wiping her tears. Now that she decided to leave the kingdom with the goal of being the crown prince’s wife, she would be in trouble if she got entangled with Sir Feden because she couldn’t control her emotions. She had nothing like patriotism for the kingdom, but if something went wrong, she would endanger the life of the man she loved.

‘It’s not easy, but I should treat him as coldly as possible.’

Gently touching the yellow petals of the marigold, she once again pulled herself together.

**

“I’m honored to see you, the Little Sun of the empire. This is Beatrice Shah, the fifth princess of the Lisa kingdom. ”

“Nice to meet you, Princess Shah. I wish you a comfortable stay while you are here.”

“Thank you, Your Majesty.”

“The chief attendant will escort you to the assigned palace. See you later.”

She slowly bowed to him, who was turning after greeting him coldy.

She felt a bit upset since he clearly drew a line, but when she entered the assigned palace, she was amazed while looking around. Although it was one of the small palaces for concubines, the place assigned to her was as well decorated as Kryans III’s palace.

Sitting in a neatly arranged room, she recalled her meeting with the crown prince a little while ago.

She could find no expression in his face and no feeling in his navy blue eyes.

Although she had no intention of following her father’s order, she felt that the crown prince was not easily seduced, given his very cold attitude.

‘Good for me!’

She didn’t want to be his wife. Her goal was to be one of his concubines and live quietly.

When the war broke out between the Lisa kingdom and the empire, she would lose her life anyway, so all she wanted was to live a comfortable life during her short period until the war broke.

But her determination like that did not last long.

“… You’re pregnant.”

“What did you say? Say it again. What did you say?”

“I’m sorry to say this, but you’re clearly pregnant.”

“Unbelievable…”

Obviously, at some point, she couldn’t swallow food because it tasted too salty or bland, too sweet or bitter. She felt disgusted about the foods she enjoyed as a rule, and even experienced dry heaving.

She thought it was strange, but she thought it’s simply because she was in a new environment. However, Sir Feden kept looking at her nervously, which made her call the royal doctor who was part of the Lisa delegation to check her condition.

“By the way, Your Highness, I just don’t understand what happened to you. It seems you are two months pregnant, so I don’t think it’s the crown prince’s baby…”

“Shut up! Keep it secret. If my pregnancy is leaked, you know that we are all dead, right? Besides, they might start a war between the two kingdoms.”

“Yes, of course. I’ll keep it secret.”

“Then get out. Again, be sure to watch your mouth.”

After warning the doctor severely, who rolled his eyes nervously, she was lost in thought. She had no idea what to do.

She paced up and down in her room for a while, then she made up her mind firmly. If they knew about her pregnancy, Sir Feden would not avoid being killed.

She didn’t care about the damage to the Lisa kingdom because of her pregnancy because she had no affection for it anyway. Gillian’s case was different. She thought she must save his life. She had to take some measures before her pregnancy was leaked.

***

“Go back.”

“Your Majesty.”

“Let me forget what happened today. So, leave my room right now.”

Her heart sank at the crown prince’s cold look. While blankly looking at him turning coldly, she left the crown prince’s palace, feeling dejected.

She made a hollow smile in spite of herself. She trembled with shame when she recalled a little while ago when she tried to seduce him by all means. What’s the difference between a prostitute who sold her body to make money and her who seduced the crown prince to protect the man she loved?

“Where have you been?”

When she entered her room with a weary heart, Gillian stopped her, holding his lips tightly. She suddenly stepped back before she knew it, feeling him staring at her intensely unfamiliar.

Avoiding him who walked toward her with strides, she kept moving back until she had her back against the cold wall. She said in a trembling voice, overwhelmed by his imposing posture.

“Oh, I went out for a walk…”

“You mean without me, your bodyguard? How could you do that here in a foreign country?”

“Well, I just felt jammed up inside…”

“Whew! I hear that you have been to the crown prince’s palace. Why did you go there?”

“Well…”

Gillian asked in a firm voice when she tried to avoid his eyes, “What are you hiding from me?”

“Oh, I’ve got nothing…”

“Aren’t you hiding something from me since the royal doctor came here to check your condition? I pretended I didn’t notice it, but I insist I want to hear from you. What the heck is it that you are trying to hide from me desperately?”

“…”

“Your Highness!”

Suddenly choked up with emotions when he called her gently, she began to tell him the truth, wiping her tears.

Gillian’s eyes, who listened to her story silently, were shocked, but only briefly. He then slowly reached out and pulled her into his arms, whispering in a low voice, “I’m sorry to have given you such a big burden… I’m so sorry, Your Highness.”

“What should I do now? If they find out about my pregnancy…”

“How many people know about your pregnancy? Only you, me and the royal doctor, right?”

“Yes.”

“Good. Please leave it to me and feel comfortable. Let me take care of it.”

She felt relaxed by his reassuring voice and patting her on the shoulder. Feeling greatly relieved, she leaned into his arms with a brighter expression after a long time. She knew it would not be easy to resolve this matter, but she just thought everything would be fine.

Only

***

“Choose. War or exile? ”

One day when she was barely getting by as if walking on a tightrope, the crown prince suddenly visited her and spat out harshly, which broke her peace altogether.

Watching her with a stoneface, who was shuddering with fear, he said, “If you want war, let me do as you wish. If you don’t, I would like to make one suggestion. ”

“Ugh? what is your suggestion?”

“Well, I think I have to tell you this first. I already know that your baby’s father is your bodyguard. So, don’t even try to make any excuses about it. ”

“Well, how did you know that…?”