The Abandoned Empress

Maybe. These days there was nothing that I liked. I didn’t like the nobles who found fault with everything I did, and I didn’t like Jiun who still didn’t know the ropes when she had been the empress for several years. days. I was just sick and tired of everybody around me.

Would it have been different if there had been Lady Monique and her supporters around me?

Suddenly, something flashed through my mind.

No way. What would have been different with that woman and the late emperor’s close aides? Even their remnant forces are rubbing me the wrong way all the time. If they had been with me until now, they would have harassed me much more.

I shook my head violently to dispel such thought. I felt I was overly stressed out these days, given that I found myself recalling them after a long time.

<You have been poisoned, Your Majesty.>

What the heck?

Stunned by his unexpected remarks, I stared quietly at the man with honey-colored hair. The young marquis, who came up to the capital and expanded his activities gradually, spoke with a very serious expression.

My head was throbbing. I let him in because he asked to see me, so little did I think he mentioned something shocking to me, the ruler of the empire.

Obviously, he was not cracking a joke about such a grave matter. He decided to mention it to me because he had some hard evidence about my poisoning. When I asked him to tell me in detail, Marquis Mirwa began to explain the situation in detail.

According to him, the Lisa kingdom produced the type of poison that would make anyone feel jammed up inside, feel dizzy, and nauseated. Besides, he said the Lisa kingdom produced one of such poisons. Once poisoned, a person would often feel irritated and angry even at trifling things.

Was it because I was poisoned that I often felt a surge of anger coming up deep down for the past several years, but could not control my feelings?

The young marquis emphasized it repeatedly. He revealed that Duke Jenna was behind all this, and that the duke had been slowly carrying out the plot. Then he handed a small bottle, saying it was an antidote that he obtained very hard, along with a thick ledger.

I turned over the pages of the ledger all night, where there were all the details including Duke Jena’s close relations with the Lisa kingdom and how he obtained the poison by using all kinds of means.

After reading through the last page, I closed the ledger and got lost in thought. According to the ledger, it was certain that Duke Jenna was the mastermind, but I could not conclude, based on the marquis’s testimony alone. Who knows if he, not the duke, was the culprit? So, I thought it would be better to order someone I could trust to investigate the incident covertly.

Then, who should I assign this task to?

I recalled the nobles who were active in politics one by one, but could not find one. Besides, even those I felt I could trust had connections with Duke Jena in one way or another.

Suddenly, my heart sank.

I could not believe that I didn’t find any single man among them that I could trust. It’s already been four years since the late emperor passed away. What did I do until now? I thought I ran my own empire, but it looked like it was run by Duke Jena.

<Your Majesty.>

I could hardly have a sip of water. One day when I was spending sleepless nights in endless vigilance and suspicion, a document that the chief attendant gave me irritated me all the more. Customarily the internal affairs of the palace department were related to women, so I could immediately find out that there was a problem with the way Jiun handled the matter.

Stupid woman. How could she not properly handle a matter like this when she became the empress four years ago?

Then, how did she manage her job until now?

I clicked my tongue when I suddenly recalled something.

I see. It was Lady Monique, not Jiun, who was in control of the internal affairs of the palace department.

Suddenly, I made a hollow smile. I have forgotten her until now, but these days something came up, which often made me recall her.

As expected, the palace department didn’t discard the documents related to her. I ordered the director of the palace department to give up Jiun’s policy and reintroduce what Lady Monique had practiced. At that moment, I suddenly recalled Lady Monique’s golden eyes wet with tears. Before I knew it, I ordered the director to bring me all the documents related to her.

While walking down the hallway of the empress’s palace, I kept thinking to myself that there was nothing special to my order, I just did it to find the mastermind, and that I could find out something meaningful because Lady Monique was in charge of the internal affairs.

Was it because I kept thinking of her? I had a big quarrel with Jiun when I casually mentioned Lady Monique’s name, frustrated with the lack of progress Jiun made in handling the palace affairs. Nonetheless, I felt I should put up with her because I loved her, but my spontaneous anger at the moment made me tell her what I honestly thought about her, which I had hidden from her until now. When she spat out what came to her mind recklessly, I slapped her in the face.

Back to the Central Palace, I picked up the documents sent by the palace department. Then I put my hand on my forehead while reading something that Lady Monique seemed to have written down in her round handwriting style. What is it all about?

I thought she was trying to act as the real owner of the inner palace by pushing Jiun out, but she didn’t. On the contrary, she prepared documents on the operation of the internal palace for Jiun. I thought she didn’t care about me at all, but she knew even my trifling taste.

I suddenly remembered what Jiun told me in the past. She said Lady Monique must have been clumsy like her at first.

Really? Just like me who knocked myself out to catch up with my father, the emperor, Lady Monique also had to go through all kinds of trials and hardship to be the empress. Just like me who got used to hiding my feelings, she also lived, keeping all her thoughts and feelings to herself.

Why didn’t I ever try to ask her why she was so indifferent, and what she thought about me?

I always guessed about her on my own. I never tried to find out what she was thinking about me or how she felt toward me. I just took it for granted that she was like a doll with no feelings, a touch cookie only serving the interests of her faction.

Why did I think so? Why did I always look at her with prejudice?

Only

<Duke Lars, I’m sorry to tell you this, but can you help me? I’m currently poisoned. No matter how hard I think about it, I guess you’re the only one I can trust. So, give me a chance to correct my past mistakes, please.>

After agonizing for a long time, I finally wrote a letter to Duke Lars. I spent lots of time finding the right person to contact the duke without inviting suspicion from the nobles.

A few weeks later, Marquis Enesil, who just inherited the title, came up to the capital to see me with a reply from Duke Lars. The duke said if I could not find anyone I could trust, I could rely on the marquis carrying his letter. He also said he would think about how to help me.

<The empress is pregnant.>

As for the investigation of my poisoning, Marquis Enesil reported that Duke Jena was the mastermind, and that the antidote Marquis Mirwa was correct. Thanks to that, I neutralized my poisoning with the antidote. Now I was looking for a way to solve this with a fresh mind.

In the meantime, the news that Jiun got pregnant made the situation worse for me. If her baby was a boy, I would be a dead man as soon as the baby was born. The nobles knew it would be much easier to install the just born crown prince as the next emperor and control national politics. Besides, they could make use of Jiun easily who would be queen mother.

At that moment, I came to think of a very bad thing. How about getting rid of the child? If I could do so, I could overturn the situation in my favor.