The Return of the Crazy Demon-Novel

Everyone stands up and greets Sword Demon with a drink. He puts down the drink he brought and looks at Sam Bok.

“Who are you?”

Sam Bok takes a step back and kneels down on one knee.

“Sam Bok, the escort to the young lord.”

Sword Demon doesn’t speak back and sits where Sam Bok sat, and then speaks to Pervert Demon.

“Drink with me.”

“Yes, master.”

After opening the cap of the sealed alcohol bottle, Sword Demon pours into the glasses as he asks me,

“Why keep the escort alive?”

I look at Sam Bok.

“To do some cleaning.”

Sword Demon answers.

“The young lords all have different characters and skills, but they aren’t the ones who choose the escorts. The escorts do not betray. Even if they wanted to betray, it is made so that it is impossible to do so.”

I nod.

“Betray in what sense? The Illusion Ghost Emperor and the young lord are like the lamp in the dark winds. If this guy doesn’t realize that and is loyal, dying together with the young lord is enough. If the target of loyalty vanishes, they won’t know what they will be loyal to. Will he be a grave handler then?”

Sword Demon nods.

“Right. Which is why, clean up first.”

Sword Demon looks at Sam Bok and asks,

“It seems like Low-Down Sect Leader has figured out the thoughts and tendencies of the sect and has you on cleaning duty. You must have survived the education of the guards, so it will be difficult to know the truth no matter how much you are tortured. However, I am uncomfortable with the ones who are persecuted for that reason alone.”

Sam Bok kneels down.

“… thank you for saving me. The Left Guardian.”

I look at Sam Bok who raises his head. He has a pale look.

Sam Bok bows to me.

“Sect Leader. I will leave.”

I nod and pull a coin from my pocket.

“Sam Bok.”

“Yes, Sect Leader.”

I treated him as human all this while.

“You must have had a hard time running errands and cleaning. As my senior said, since I am not killing you, and since young Lord Mong and Yukhap watched you, if you live according to the morals of the past, you die with your young lord. If you take this new life and abandon those age-old morals, you will be given a chance to see the world. The choice is yours. I wish you luck in whatever choice you make to live. Have this. Sam Bok, the third subordinate.”

A common coin isn’t a lot of money.

I hand him the coins and he holds his hands out not wanting the coins to fall. I look into Sam Bok’s eyes one last time and say goodbye.

“Do not forget the words of senior Sword Demon.”

“Yes.”

Sam Bok walks to the entrance of the guest house, turns to us and bows deeply.

After kicking out the escort, Sword Demon finally raises his glass.

“Thanks to Sect Leader, more people die and there are often situations where those who should die, come back to life. Let’s drink.”

We drank the alcohol Sword Demon brought, but it was much worse than the one we drank before.

Sword Demon says,

“Sect Leader is crueler than anyone else, and more merciful too. Do you think living like this is the right answer?”

I answer being a bit drunk.

“Where even is the answer? I regret things more than 12 times in a day. Three or four times it is embarrassing, two or three times it is laughter. But at least once a day I think about where the people I spared are living and doing. The people I saved are scattered all around Namhwam, Namcheon, Nammyung. If I kill people I don’t like every now and then, surely one day I will be called the Fourth Disaster. And that cannot be.”

Sword Demon who rarely smiles, smiles.

“Yes, the aspirations of Sect Leader are huge. Fourth Disaster huh.”

Pervert Demon responds.

“Exactly.”

Pervert Demon fills the glasses again and we drink again. Not all of them are men who pretend to be weak, so I sigh.

I say to the three of them.

“It doesn’t matter if you are drunk or not. Let’s just talk drunk. The four of us have been through such a boring life. Someone lived a boring life like a monk who is meditating.”

I point to Sword Demon.

“A man who lived most of his life thinking about revenge.”

And then to Ghost Demon.

“The shit face who is crazy for women but cannot meet the one who he is deeply in love with.”

I point to Pervert Demon now and then to myself.

“I have been insane half my life. Maybe that is why I do not have a nice personality. But out of all the strong people, why is it that the only one who is crazy for revenge, man who lives like a monk, and the one crazy for women have to communicate with me?”

Yukhap tilts his head and smiles.

“Hehe…”

Pervert Demon shrugs his shoulders and smiles and so does Sword Demon.

I look at them.

“This time, I have to say something really drunk to get this over. Who should we start with? Yukgap?”

Yukhap nods.

“It is Yukhap. I was actually trying to kill you.”

“Right.”

“I dreamed of revenge when I was caught in Black Rabbit Union, when I was beaten by you, when I laid down, when I ate the poison Doctor Moyong gave me. Then, after fighting somewhere, you came back, and got angry as you told me to get out.”

I nodded.

“I did.”

“Actually, you could have killed me, but you forgave me the way you did. I accepted it right away and was about to leave until master Ho Yeon caught me.”

“What did he say?”

Master Yukhap looks a bit puzzled.

“Just that I should be healthy. For a moment, it felt like the lump in my heart disappeared then. It wasn’t the anger I had towards you, it just seemed to be a lump of frustration that piled up for a long time. Maybe the little monster made for revenge vanished then. And then, as you know, I came up with the idea of moving together. Is this enough to satisfy your demands of drunken conversation?”

I nod.

“Nice.”

Pervert Demon says,

“Master, I have never seen such a country man in my life. The only thing he is good at is fighting.”

Sword Demon answers,

“What is it that you want to say?”

Pervert Demon smiles as he says,

“He is a simple useless guy, like me..”

Sword Demon agrees.

“Right. I have never seen one like Sect Leader.”

I look at the master and disciple.

“Drunk?”

Sword Demon nods and says,

“We are in fact, quite narrow minded. Our stomachs do not wish to help others. We fight, we need to win. We train to win. And far from being bound by anything. For some people, it is the mindset that one should pursue teaching by cultivating, but your nature itself seems titled on that side. Every time you visit me, the boredom in my life which had accumulated disappears. What about you?”

The three of them look at me and I tell them.

“I feel a lot better now.”

“For?”

“The fact that the man crazy for sword, man crazy about revenge, man crazy for women are actually strong people who aren’t easy to meet. We are men who are crazy or on the verge of it. And one look at us is enough to know it. The same for Im So-Baek. Women. Subordinates, religion, revenge, martial arts… we have different interests we pursue; we aren’t men who harass those who don’t learn martial arts. And I will stick to that line. I am saying this drunk, but I hope the three of you get it.”

And this time I poured the three of them a drink.

I reveal my true feelings after drinking the alcohol that was stronger than ever before passing out.

“My dream is to not go insane. While surviving in Kangho, I realized that the craziest thing is to not get crazy. I killed the Butcher and Woodcutter with my hands and their master is one called Baek Wei. Have you heard of them, senior Sword Demon?”

“My first time.”

I pass on my assumption to them.

“If it is as I think- that man has gifted me the ice arts in the past.”

They all appear shocked.

“… so, without realizing, I ended up as a person he is experimenting on. After handing over that ice arts, he seemed to be waiting for some news to come about me. Of course, people like me are not alone. Kangho is going insane, and I haven’t gone insane yet. I think it would be right to go crazy just about now?”

Sword Demon nods.

“If you go crazy then you fall into their control.”

Pervert Demon shakes his head.

“Right. He is already crazy now. So, stop being crazy.”

And Ghost Demon asks,

“The one who delivered the ice arts… you sure about it?”

I nod.

“Yes. It was the same when I met with the leader of Blood Night Palace. She said she was mad at me. Come to think of it, everyone seems to be waiting for me to go insane. And this is all just drunken talk…”

I gulp another drink down.

“My enemies and rivals… it looks like they are waiting for me to go crazy, so I need to be a normal person. Protect those who haven’t mastered the martial arts yet, beat the unorthodox sects to death and harass the others, and if one asks for help from Murim Alliance Leader, I will head to them too.”

Pervert Demon, who is listening to me, smiles.

“An ally? Then a good ally for sure.”

I spill out drunk words.

“I am no righteous swordsman. And the three of you know very well that even if I wake up from death, I cannot become a righteous one.”

And Pervert Demon says,

“What nonsense is this master?”

Sword Demon raises his hand and closes his disciple’s mouth.

I look at the three of them and laugh.

“… without a doubt, the craziest ones in this crazy world are the righteous swordsmen. I am different from the three of you who wish for individual success, and I have a different mindset, a different attitude to life. I am drunk. I hope the three of you don’t become my enemies in the future. Do not lick the feet of Cult Leader just because you are afraid of him. I will beat you to death.”

I lose my temper and knock on the table making the snack bowls and glasses all bounce up and down.

“Do not let me kill the three of you with my own hands. Get it?”

Pervert Demon laughs out loud and says,

“How can you harm master when you are less skilled than him? Master, Zaha seems really drunk.”

Sword Demon nods.

“He is drunk.”

Ghost Demon grabs my shoulder.

“Sect Leader, stop drinking. You are already drunk.”

While I am drunk, I pour the alcohol and fill the glasses of Sword Demon, Pervert Demon, and Ghost Demon.

“Have a drink. You evil people. Hehehe. I feel really good today, let us drink more.”

As Sword Demon brings another cup of strong alcohol, it feels like my mouth is on fire.

I put my hand on the table while drunk.

“… everyone put your hands up. Hurry.”

“…”

When the Pervert Demon looks at me with a troubled look, Sword Demon reaches his hand out and puts it on mine first.

“I am first.”

When Sword Demon holds his hand out, Ghost Demon and Pervert Demon have no choice but to put theirs.

Shaking the hands of the three people on mine, I say,

“The elder Hyung’s name is Sword Demon. A man who excels in sword. The second one’s name is Master Yukhap, but the face doesn’t go well with the ugly face, so I will give him the name of Ghost Demon. The second one’s name is that. And the third is Low-Down Sect Leader, Lee Zaha, that is me. Following the names of the two older ones, mine will be Crazy Demon. And the fourth is Mong Rang. Since he is madly revealing his desire for women, if he is not Pervert Demon, who will be called that? You are the fourth.”

“…”

“We were born around the same….”

Pervert Demon groans.

“Shut up you bastard! Do it in moderation! For real!”

I laughed as I stopped talking and began to laugh too much while holding my stomach. After laughing, I tell the three of them.

“The brotherhood resolutions won’t work. And it cannot be helped. It is because there are no peach trees, so let us move on.”

Sword Demon tells me,

“Third one, wrap it up now.”

“….”

We all stared at Sword Demon. This bastard who has always been serious and never lets himself divert a little from his character said this. I let out a sigh and then say,

“The three of you are now my people. The wicked who beat the wicked and evil ones to death. The Evil People’s organization. For the wellbeing and peace of Kangho. It is a good thing.”

Pervert Demon removes his hand.

“Crazy idiot, do it in moderation.”

Ghost Demon mumbles.

“The one who cannot even handle a drink.”

Sword Demon points to the messy table.

“Put this away. Go now.”

The atmosphere is awkward because it wasn’t my business to be drunk, and I am feeling drowsy, so I pull the chair and put my feet on it and close my eyes.

It is the moment to take out the dagger and put it….

Everything is too bothersome because I am drunk.

.

.

.

Dagger, given up, today.