This Eroge Won't Make Me Fall!



"Pfft, Titania do you think I am drunk?"

"I am certain you are drunk. It does seem like the spirits are bamboozling you."

The fairy answered right away. That succccckeddd!

What was I to do now?

The world will end and I'll still be drunk.

I'll lose muscle mass from the alcohol!! No!!!!!!!

Heh.

Well, whatever, I liked talking with all the little wittle spirits dancing around and laughing around like stupid idiots all the time.

"Go back, I have matters to attend to."

"Wassup?"

Rio sighed once more.

"The first is a race with a tamed beast, but the student that had one in our academy got injured."

"Ooooh! Sucks, just sucks."

I shook my head and placed a hand on Rio's shoulder.

"I. Feel. Very. Bad. For. You."

This was the worst, the absolute worst.

How was anyone supposed to live after being faced with such a predicament? Even the strongest would cave against something like this.

"You know what? Strength comes from your surroundings."

Yes. That was the case.

"I'll help you. Let me help you. I'll fix this problem for you."

Rio tilted her head to the side, but it mattered little.

I snapped my fingers, summoned a shield, and got on it with Miss Rio in tow.

"I don't like this."

"Oh yeah? Losers can't be choosers, miss."

"Haha, I am sure you'll do something good. I can tell because I am your teacher."

"Bet you are."

The spirits floated along, my sight was completely covered by them. With the shield dashing through, sometimes wobbling around, I made my way back to near where the ceremony was held, more specifically, where I could find Lethe.

The girl with the veil was walking around in a dress of blue and white, her veil always matching her clothes.

"LETTHEE!"

I screamed.

"What are you doing?"

"You wanted a rider, right? So shut up."

Lethe looked up. I could tell she was happy as all hell to see me since I was too. I jumped down the shields and stopped in front of her.

"Come."

"Where?"

I grabbed her hand, made another shield, and took her along.

Lethe didn't question it much and flew in the sky with me. The people below were fairly stunned but who cared? Losers who can't fly don't deserve an opinion.

"Let's go."

' Really don't like what you've doing eyre."

Don't worry about it one bit. All is good, god is good, me is good,

"Now then, where is the competition taking place again?"

"There." Rio pointed at the skies.

"What is going on?' Asked my love but I only held her hand and told her I needed her help.

Soon enough, we were at the spot where the competition was to take place. There, a bunch of people had already gathered and floating again in the skies on basic bubble sp0ells were different checkpoints.

People sitting on different mounts met my eyes. Some of them were on horses with wings, another on a turtle, m without wings, and more on birds and animals alike.

The best one, though, had a giant space-ship like robot golem going for him.

People from all seven academies except ours had gathered for the competition. The principal of the Tamer academy stood at the front, frowning at Rio.

"You're late, miss."

"Of course, this is not my job."

Woah! Rio feisty! It seemed that she was only normally kind to me and not to others.

"Who is the participant? You are not allowed to fly, you know?"

"Of course, of course, of course," I said. "I,… would first like… to apologize…"

"What?"

"That you're balding."

The new principal scowled and everyone around laughed.

"I would love to do something, but I am not omnipotent. I can only express, my sorry, and my deep deep disappointment when I see your balding face. Pfft! Hahaha!"

Lethe laughed too.

The principal shook.

"What is the meaning of this?"

"He's right, principal, you are balding."

The one on the golem chimed in. He seemed like a pretty boy with a bob cut and a petite stature, the type that could do bad things and gets away with it without any repercussion whatsoever.

The principal sighed and turned to me.

"Get to it, we're running out of time."

"Right, right. What mount, do you think, is the best for this kinda thing?"

"Are you saying you don't even have a mount!?"

The principal guy was rather pissy. But that one student was still pretty chill.

"Gotta be a wyvern, no?"

"Really? I think a dragon would do better."

"Dragons have low mobility, you bastards."

"Uwak!" I almost puked. They all turned my way. "No dragons folks."

"Eugene, you're drunk?"

"Drunk! This student is here drunk!?"

"No!" I screamed. "Anyway, right, Wyvern you say?"

Titania seemed to be shaking her head, but I didn't care.

I turned to the spirits with a bright smile and clapped my hands.

"Wyvern, please~"

The spirits laughed and cackled, all of them looking at me skeptically.

"I'll treat you to whatever you want."

The spirits beamed.

In the blink of an eye.

—"AAAH!"

"KIEEEE!"

The principal and the new Wyvern friend both screamed. The wyvern, in a fit of rage, raised its black wings high and turned its beak skyward, a dense mass of unrivaled magical energy condensed near its mouth.

I simply picked up Lethe, held her in front of the beast. Kicked the wyvern in the stomach and slightly moved away her veil.

The wyvern looked down.

It saw her face and immediately became a pet begging for attention.

"W-what sorcery!!?"

"WOah!" The pretty boy screamed too. "Did you just tame it? Just like that?"

"My girlfriend can tame all of you. Now shut up."

I hugged Lethe from the back.

"I will get back at you for this," she murmured.

"Help help, you should help everyone."

Everyone was nice.

You should love everyone.

"Oh?"

Ew No.

People sucked.

Geez. You should hate everyone.

Anyway, Rio begged, Lethe climbed and the wyvern fucked its competition in the ass.

I would have stuck around till the end, but I got distracted and moved away.

And then I found, my dearest friend Luka facing a punching strength competition. Neat!

***

[A/N: Let's sprint to the finish line! No more R18 chap btw]