Tondemo Skill de Isekai Hourou Meshi

Gumihou: Deleted some repetitive bits and added details where needed.

After lunch, I set out of the house to see Bruno-san.

Fer and the others came with me out of boredom, I think?

I guess there’s only so much time you could spend napping in various places…

““So, we’re going to the stalls after this, yeah?””

Ah, so that’s their true motive.

Moving on, all four Gluttonous Quartet were with me today, but the atmosphere around them was a little strange. For one thing, Fer and Dora-chan had been staring at Grandpa Gon ever since breakfast.

As for Grandpa Gon, he had been avoiding everyone’s eyes…

“Oi, can you two please stop staring at me?” Grandpa Gon grumbled.

“I can’t help it, [1a] I am trying to see what a lump of disappointment looked like,” smirked Fer.

““It was a surprise for me too~~”” Dora-chan chimed in.

“Gunununu…”

After having been discovered in that awful belly-up sleeping position, it was hard for Grandpa Gon to argue back.

“I used to see you as a rival who could stand against me on equal terms. Seeing you in that pathetic position… hm,” Fer was shaking his head in that pitying manner that made even me, a bystander, want to kick him.

““Yeah, yeah, it was seriously ridiculous to see an Ancient Dragon sleeping belly-up like that!”” added Dora-chan.

“Gununu, you’ve also slept with your belly up too…” Grandpa Gon muttered.

““Yeah, but I’m a tiny, tiny, Pixie Dragon, nobody important at all!”” Dora-chan cheerfully answered, not at all bothered by the comparison.

Well, I guess Dora-chan sleeping with his belly up is cute, while someone like the dignified Grandpa Gon would look more… pathetic somehow. Kind of like seeing an important political figure with a tie around their head and snoring upside down on a sofa…

Still, it is every being’s right to enjoy themselves during their downtime. It would be tough to maintain a dignified façade every day, so let’s throw Grandpa Gon a lifeline.

“Ahem, right, enough of that Fer, Dora-chan. Don’t be so hard on Grandpa Gon. He got drunk because he felt safe at home and could trust everyone to protect him when he was out, you know? So, don’t be mean. As for Grandpa Gon, I don’t mind it if you drink, but maybe be a little bit more mindful about it, yeah?”

“O-of course!”

While I gave Grandpa Gon a helping hand, I have a general disapproval against irresponsible drinking. Grandpa Gon let his guard down too much and embarrassed himself. Mister Ancient Dragon, you’re not Yamato no Orochi [2], so you can’t go around drinking carelessly like that.

“”Grandpa Gon was all ‘gugooo~~’ when sleeping~~”” Sui chimed in as she bounced happily on Grandpa Gon’s back.

“Ahaha,” there’s really no need to rub salt on the dragon’s wound, my dear Sui…

The other two started sniggering at each other again.

Anyway, we eventually made it to our destination even as my familiars joked and teased each other. The destination in question was Bruno-san’s office. The contractor who had expanded our bathrooms last time.

“Please wait outside,” I said to my familiars before entering the office. They were a little too preoccupied to answer me. Anyway, I entered the office and called out a hesitant, “Hello~?”

Back when they renovated my bathroom, I asked them to construct some houses for my employees but was told they needed about two months to complete another job first. Well, it was now a little over two months, which is why I am here now.

“Oh my, if it isn’t Mukouda-san? It’s been a long time, hasn’t it?” Bruno-san’s wife, Annika-san came out to greet me. “I heard you went to the Royal Capital?”

“Yes,” and what a trip it was.

“Well, if you’re an S Ranker, I’m sure you’ll be called up by the Royal Capital.”

Hahaha, what she did not know was that my party was the reason why all the high-ranking Adventurers were called up…

Ahem.

“I came here to inquire about the house building situation…” I began, trying to gauge her reaction.

“Ah, I see, that’s…” Annika looked troubled.

“… was there an issue?” I prompted.

“Well, Bruno is currently constructing a new home for a merchant’s son and his new wife. It seems the lady is quite particular. Even the initial order was quite extensive…”

“I see, I see,” the senses I had developed during my former occupation as a salaryman immediately tingled. It was at yellow alert for ‘annoying customer’ warning.

“As you know, construction work isn’t that straightforward, depending on the situation, changes could still be made on various reasons such as original building, construction site, cost of materials etc. Bruno is especially good at being flexible about this but… hmm, how should I put it? The wife kept piling on more orders on top of orders and, well, I must say that the construction has not been going well…”

“Ah,”

“Dear Bruno was so angry that he yelled at the customer to just ‘Decide already!’ and the other new bride was like ‘we’ll pay the extra cost so do your job properly!!’ Ahhh, it was all rather troublesome…”

“I-is that so?” I guess we’re at the gossiping stage now. Still, given how fierce Bruno-san was, I can’t believe that a new bride would actually quarrel with him like that. Wow, she must have nerves of steel.

“We did receive half of the payment upfront and they have been paying us for all the additional work, so it’s not like we could say anything about them defaulting on the payment,” Annika sighed.

“S-sounds like they are… quite rich,” I said, unsure how else to describe these ‘annoying customer’ characters.

“Hmm, I believe the lady has an ideal ‘dream home’ in mind, so I expect the job would likely last another two to three weeks at least. Please accept my apologies for the delay,” Annika-san bowed to me.

“No, no, if that’s the situation, it’s not like we can do much about it,” I said.

“The moment the job from that customer is done, I shall contact Mukouda-san immediately!”

“I see, thank you very much,” I said.

“Speaking of which,” Annika-san suddenly lowered her voice and leaned forward. I reflexively leaned in as well.

“I had a little of the ‘whisky’ thing that my husband received from Mukouda-san. I must say, it was really delicious.”

“Ah, um, well.”

Annika was still beaming, she had a hand on my shoulder so I could not lean back or get away.

“I was really surprised because it was my first time trying such delicious alcohol. It’s strong but smooth as well, goodness, it was simply irresistible!”

“Hahaha,” I heard you. So, let go of my should, please.

“Bruno told me that Mukouda-san sells alcohol on an… irregular basis, yes?”

“Yes?” I said. “Um, only when I’m free…”

“Do you have any here?”

“Uh?”

“If you’ve been to your hometown, you must have brought some back, right? Yes? Hm?”

This… this is actually quite terrifying!! Th-the hand on my shoulder tightened and I could feel goosebumps rising on my skin from her intense stare. She was a tiny lady, but her hands were really strong.

“I- I guess?”

“Excellent!”

“No, no, wait, I mean, I have some in my hometown, but I haven’t been there yet. I need… I only go there when I’m free, so…”

“I see, so Mukouda-san could only go back to his hometown when he’s free,” said Annika. “What a shame.”

“W-well, i-in fact, I was planning to open a liquor store, but-”

“Truly!!??”

“Yes,” I already regretted saying this, but considering how many alcoholics there were in Carelina alone from that time Bruno-san renovated my bathroom, the best thing would be to have a formal store selling liquor than having them try to corner me like this for alcohol.

“Oh my, oh my, my, my, Bruno would be so elated to hear this! Nothing gets a dwarf motivated like alcohol~!”

“Naturally,” I said as I was hit by a sudden lightbulb moment. “I should also say that the new construction at my house is meant for new staff. Right now, my servants could hardly keep up with the shampoo and soap orders, so, it is impossible for me to even think about starting a new store…”

“Ah! I see! That is a grave sin indeed!” Annika gasped. “Goodness, I shall have to hurry Bruno about this. Yes, rather than messing around with that nit-picky young Miss Bride, Bruno should have his priorities right!”

“Hahaha,” I felt a little sorry for the young bride in question, but you already have Bruno-san with you for more than two months. I want to get my project going too, so please don’t hate me too much.

After a final goodbye to Annika, along with a deposit of a bottle of good whisky as a ‘gift’, I left the office, feeling a little overwhelmed.

“That was exhausting…”

“Oi, are you done?”

“Well, done here anyway,” I said. “Let’s go home.”

“”No way! I’m hungry! Let’s check out the food stalls!!””

“Agreed,”

“I agree as well, Master.”

““Meaty~~ yay~~!””

“Wait, stop for a second you guys…”

However, it was too late. They have already left in the direction of the food stalls.

Haahhh… I wonder if they could just eat on credit without me there?

No, I can’t rest properly if I’m not there to personally supervise. Who knows what they might do if I’m not there?

[Gumihou: Redid the Annika vs Mukouda interaction for a more dynamic yet realistic encounter. Also, Mukouda kept saying he ‘could only open a store when he was done with his work’ which… is kind of weird? Went with the ‘could only go to hometown for alcohol when free’ since that makes more sense.]

[1] While it is fine to make Grandpa Gon the butt of a joke, overdoing it just makes the humour seems tedious

[1a] The original was Fer giving some generic comments on something he would never care about. Inject more sarcasm.

[2] Yamato no Orochi – An eight-headed, eight-tailed serpent known to enjoy alcohol and human flesh.

https://mythus.fandom.com/wiki/Yamata_no_Orochi

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_1KJqD-55Gg