Tondemo Skill de Isekai Hourou Meshi

Eguchi Ren: I’m late, sorry… (sweats)

“Haahh…”

“Oi, why are you sighing like that?” asked Fer.

“Geez, I wonder why,” I muttered with a glare. “Why don’t you take the time to think why!”

“Because you are strange?”

“Aughh!!! Noo!! It’s because of you!! This is all your fault! All your fault!”

“What nonsense are you speaking now?”

“What the- it’s not nonsense! It’s not nonsense, okay?!”

Once we get back to Carelina, who do you think will be scolded by the Guild Master, huh? Aahhh!! Just thinking about what happened at the Adventurer’s Guild makes me want to rip someone’s fur out!!

As threatened, Fer rushed through the streets of Carelina with me on his back, barreling into the Adventurer’s Guild, nearly trampling down the people there. Luckily everyone within the Guild were Adventurers who faced danger every day and could sense when a threat appeared. Someone must have run to fetch the Guild Master because, in no time at all, Willem-san was standing at the top of the stairs, looking down at us with wide, horrified eyes.

He was right to be horrified.

Fer flung his head back and announced, “We are going to hunt the Green Dragon.” Then, without so much as a by-your-leave, he turned around and sprinted out of the Adventurer’s Guild.

“Wait!” I shrieked. “Stop!!”

However, he did not listen at all. The next thing I knew we were through the city gate and bounding over grasslands to the location where Grandpa Gon could safely transform to his normal size and we took off into the sky.

And now, we are on our way there.

Wherever ‘there’ is.

“Haahhh… what should I do now? Willem-san looked so shocked… I’m sure he’s going to blame me for this incident…”

Sadly, I was starting to get used to being the one to be blamed for all of these shenanigans…

As for our current location, well, Fer and Grandpa Gon had been going on and on about a trip to ‘Hunt the Green Dragon’, but neither ever really did say where the Green Dragon actually was.

“What are you muttering about now?” Fer snapped.

I glared sharply at this root of all evil.

“This is all your fault! No, this is yours and Grandpa Gon’s fault!”

““Nu, I as well?”” Grandpa Gon’s answer came via telepathy. I think he was not aware that he thought that out loud.

“You guys just dropped a bomb at the Adventurer’s Guild about how you’re ‘going to hunt a Green Dragon’ but never said anything about where we are going! I told you to stop, didn’t I? But did you listen? Who do you think the Guild Master will scold later?!!”

To be scolded for something that was not even my fault, just what kind of injustice is that?! Aren’t I in the right to be angry about this!!

“… instead of worrying about pointless things, Master should save your energy. The location of the Green Dragon is quite far away. We may only arrive after sunset. We will only start hunting in earnest tomorrow. As the weakest one, Master should take the time to rest,” said Fer.

“You–!!!”

“”As Fer said, even I will need more time to reach the location. Master should take a rest.””

“Oi! Don’t change the subject! Just where is that place? Don’t ignore me!!”

“Is it really important for Master to know now?” asked Fer. “We will be there sooner or later, whether Master knows about the place or not.”

““Umu,””

“…you know what? I don’t care anymore. I’m going to sleep.”

I flopped down on Grandpa Gon’s back, only to find that it felt too hard. In the end, I wriggled over to Fer’s side and used him as a pillow.

Sui hopped into my arms, “”Aruji~~? Sleepy~~? Sui will sleep too~~””

“Ahhh, Sui-tan is the only comforting thing in this miserable world…”

“”Tee hee~ it tickles~~””

“”Hey, I’m going to take a nap too,”” said Dora-chan as he dived down and snuggled up next to me.

That’s right, since there was really nothing I could do, let’s not worry about it anymore.

“…up… wa…e up! Oi! Wake up!”

Pain exploded in the back of my head and I immediately woke up.

“Ouch! What the- what the heck?!”

“It’s your own fault for not waking up even though I have called you many times,” said Fer.

He was standing upright and… I must have fallen when my pillow got up and I hit my head against Grandpa Gon’s hard scales. Rubbing the back of my head, I grumbled, “Surely there’s a gentler way to wake someone up…”

“We have arrived, time for dinner!”

Was Fer’s only answer before leaping off Grandpa Gon’s back.

“”Master is up? Quickly now!”

“”Aruji~ Hurry~””

The two smaller familiars were already skipping about on the ground, waiting to be fed.

“Yes, yes, I’m coming…” It’s not like I wanted to be here anyway.

After I had slid off Grandpa Gon’s back, he transformed to a more manageable size while I took a look around. We have landed in some kind of dense forest. This forest was nothing like the jungle-like place inside the caldera, the trees were bigger, sure, but it was still a forest.

“The Green Dragon is somewhere within that deep forest,” said Grandpa Gon. “Master, it would be best to rest here and eat. Tomorrow, we may head out to look for the dragon.”

“Umu, that’s right, it’s time to eat.”

“”Ahh~ I’m so hungry~~!””

“”Sui is hungry too~~””

“Geez, that’s the only thing on your minds,” I said, exasperated by their behaviour.

Anyway, we had Dungeon Pork Teriyaki Bowl which I had already pre-made. After that quick but filling dinner, we all went to bed early in anticipation of tomorrow’s Adventures.

By ‘we’, I meant my familiars.

I was not looking forward to anything at all.

The next morning…

“Haahh~~ woah, I still managed to sleep, hmm~”

I stepped out of my temporary box-shaped shelter to soak in the morning sun. I had already slept on Grandpa Gon on the way here, and did not expect to feel sleepy. However, it turned out that I could still sleep pretty well.

I guessed it must be travel fatigue.

““Aruji~~ Good morning~~!!””

“Ah, morning Sui.” [1]

“Umu, where’s breakfast?”

“Good morning, Master.”

“”Ou! Morning!””

Everyone looked very bright and cheerful. I’m sure their minds were filled with hunting and killing and the eating of dragon meat, completely forgetting the fact that they would have to see Elland-san for that part.

As for me, well, my job was to provide meals. Which I did. There were some Katsu Sandwiches in my [Item Box], which I quickly piled onto plates and served them out. For myself, I had a light breakfast consisting of a couple of rice balls and some pickles.

All too soon, it was time to enter the forest.

“”Sui wants to meet mister dragon soon~~””

The forest here looked similar to the other forests that I had been through, except it was much thicker with leaves so thick that it was almost dark under the forest. It felt like Fer was running at a much slower pace than before, but I can’t be sure…

Grandpa Gon also moved quite fast for a dragon running on two legs. It was shocking how something so large could move so quietly. This way, it felt more like a ‘hunt’ rather than just ‘general massacre’.

[1] Which I was happy for the local inhabitants, but it still doesn’t make me feel better about hunting in such a place. They were even speaking through telepathy, which made me even more anxious.

[1] Just what kind of creature was the Green Dragon?

““Hey, um, so, is the Green Dragon’s lair still far? How about we take a little break soon?””

Fortunately, Fer and Grandpa Gon actually slowed down.

“Hmm, I guess it’s fine. Grandpa Gon looked like he had a hard time keeping up with me,” smirked Fer.

“Haa… haa… what are you saying? I’m not tired at all,” Grandpa Gon insisted, even though he was panting hard. I guess flying and running on two legs used up different muscles or something?

Also, Grandpa Gon was our main vehicle getting here from Carelina, so, of course, he would be tired. Feeling a little sympathetic, I said, “Would you like something to drink?”

“Cola,” said Fer immediately.

“”Me too!””

“”Sui too~~””

“Master, a cold beer would-”

“Rejected.”

There is no way I’m letting anyone have beer in the middle of a hunt, overpowered or not.

Just as I was sticking my hand into my [Item Box], something whooshed past my face and hit the tree behind me with a ‘thunk’.

It was… an arrow.

“Eh?”

Contrary to me, Fer and Grandpa Gon were glaring in the opposite direction.

“Oi, come out!”

“We know you’re there,” said Grandpa Gon.

When I looked in the same direction as my familiars were looking, a man emerged from the foliage with a cocked bow in hand, clearly ready for a battle.

No, not a man. That long flowing golden hair, that unnatural grace…

“An Elf…?”

“No, that’s no ordinary Elf,”

“Umu, that’s a High Elf.”

“A… High Elf?”

[Gumihou: Hmm, I wonder what’s the difference?]

[1] Redid the ‘morning!’ and ‘morning!’ greetings. The dialogues were… well.